Psychic Powers

 "Wisdom is the best psychic power."
Ajahn Brahm

A Simple Sharing: Money & Happiness

Below is a write up of a sharing that I prepared for a class next week. 

A Simple Sharing: Money & Happiness

A very good evening to my dear brothers and sisters, today I am going to share about the relationship between money and happiness. As the saying goes, “money can’t buy us happiness”, we may or may not agree with this notion. Today in contrary to the saying, I am going to share a little bit on the utilization of money to well, in a mundane sense, buy us happiness.

Michael Norton, an associate professor of business at Harvard once said, “If you think money
can't buy happiness, you're not spending it right.” So now the next question is how do we spend our money right to get happiness? Research had shown that when we spend money on two types of ‘expenditure’, we experience higher level of happiness as opposed to purchasing material desires. What exactly are the two types of ‘expenditure’? They are (a) experiential and (b) pro-social purchases.

The first type of expenditure is experiential purchases; the level of happiness experienced is much higher in comparison to material purchases (Carter & Gilovich, 2010; Van Boven & Gilovich, 2003; Van Boven L. , 2005). What do I mean by experiential purchases? Imagine spending money on a beach resort stay with your loved ones in the Maldives. And imagine spending the same amount of money on a branded bag. Which purchase will make you feel happier? Of course some of you may disagree with me and prefer the bag to the resort stay but it is ok as long as you are happy.

The second type of expenditure is pro-social purchases; the level of happiness experienced when we spent money on others is much higher in comparison to spending money on oneself (Dunn, Aknin & Norton, 2008). Imagine spending money to buy a present for your parents, your boyfriend, girlfriend. And imagine spending the same amount of money on an expensive dinner for yourself alone. Which purchase will make you feel happier? Imagine again, spending money on donations to the disadvantaged, to purchase a few packs of tissues from an elderly and compare it with spending the same amount of money to purchase a pair of shoes for oneself. What is your choice?

Happiness, lies not, in how much we earn but how we spend what we earn. Again, happiness is a very subjective concept and not all of us may agree on the same conceptualization. It is ok, as long as you are happy. At the end of the day, I want to leave everyone with this quote from Simple Bear, “happiness is an experience, not a possession.”

Thank you everyone for your time and attention. And have a great evening.

References

 Carter, T. J., & Gilovich, T. (2010). The relative relativity of material and experiential purchases. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology , 98 (1), 146-159.

Dunn, E. W., Aknin, L. B., & Norton, M (2008). Spending Money on Others Promotes Happiness. Science , 319 (5870), 1687-1688.

Van Boven, L., & Gilovich, T. (2003). To Do or to Have? That Is the Question. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology , 85 (6), 1193-1202.

Van Boven L. (2005). Experientialism, materialism, and the pursuit of happiness. Review of General Psychology , 9 (2), 132-142.

好朋友

"你是你自己最好的朋友。"
简单熊 25.02.2013.

You and Me

The Bear asked me, "Who are you without me?"
I answered, "There is no you without me neither will there be me without you."

#mindofasimplebear

尽行寿 献生命

尽行寿 献生命

简单的六个字, 但每一个字听进了心灵深处, 有了震撼的回响.

当我第一次在影片中听到已故的聖嚴師父说这句话时, 我流下了激动的眼泪.

有一种莫名的感动.

前一刻的我感觉有点累, 想放下一切休息. 回去再看了影片一次, 又听到了聖嚴師父说这句话, 再一次被感动, 仿佛有了动力再往前冲.

再一次的提醒自己, 时间不多了, 能做多少就做多少.

感谢聖嚴師父对我心灵的启发.

希望在接下来的生命中我能做的到, 尽行寿 献生命.

愿一切众生都发起慈悲之心, 唤起自身的佛性, 普度众生, 成就佛道.

愿一切众生幸福快乐.

合十感恩

简单熊 19.02.2013.

Falling in Love With Myself

Sometimes, in the middle of the night, loneliness creeps in.

Alone, I hope for a shoulder to lean on, a hug to rest in.  I know it is the time; the time for me to hibernate, to rejuvenate myself and to save myself from the fatigue of interacting with the world.

There are still a lot to do; responsibilities to be carried out, obligations to be fulfilled but how can I be in the right state of mind to express any form of metta and compassion if I am not kind and compassionate to myself?

Mahatma Gandhi once said, “You must be the change you want to see in the world.”

All forms of changes starts with oneself; and to fulfill my humble aspiration of extending love and compassion to others, I must first extend the love and compassion, internally, to myself.

Ajahn Cagino once said in a Dharma talk that when we practice metta meditation, the first step is to express the wish for oneself to be well and happy and when we expresses the wish for all sentient beings to be well and happy, we need to remember that we are part of all sentient beings. When I heard it the first time, I was totally blown away by the seemingly simple insight; when we think of great compassion, we have the tendency to think and fall into the extremity of sacrificing oneself for the sake of others, without wisdom and that is not, true compassion.

“If one is suffering, how can one save others from sufferings.”

Simple Bear 18.02.2013.

If I am dependent on others for salvation from sufferings, then I am leaving my salvation to others; I don’t have autonomous control over my own salvation.  

if we are dependent on externalities such as others calling us, complimenting us, giving us a present as dominant conditions for our own happiness, Venerable Chuan Guan once wrote ‘such a person hands over their happiness to others like the remote controller of a air-con unit, allowing others to raise or lower our emotional "temperature" and happiness in our life.’

Am I going to subject myself to the puppetry of others’ actions and intentions? I guess I won’t want to be a puppet bear.

One of my fellow Dharma friends told me over the weekend, that she always sees me being very happy and jovial; and want to learn from me. I am humbled and perhaps, feeling a little insecure by the compliment. Am I truly happy?

I guess most of the time, I am happy but there will be times, when I am alone, and unhappy. My friends would joked that I should get myself a girlfriend, I told them if I get a girlfriend because of the mere fact that I needed someone by my side, then it would be unfair to her. Falling in love in such time is a misperception; perhaps, it is mental and emotional fatigue has been disguised as love, conditioned by expectations and resulting in sufferings in the future.

During such times, I will fall in love again, with myself; having the care and love for myself and perhaps, emerge from the snow, a stronger, and hopefully more loving and kind bear.

My friends, remember to hug yourself if you ever need a hug; there is no need to wait for someone else to do it.

May all be well and happy.

With Metta,

Simple Bear 18.02.2013.

Today, not Yesterday or Tomorrow

'We pine for yesterday, dream of tomorrow and forget today; we always miss the time for happiness.'
Simple Bear 14.02.2013.