Reflection 2016
It is the last day of the year 2016. And it is time to perhaps to do a reflection of the past 365 days.
2016 had been a crazy year for me, from surviving a car accident,
months of being away from work and to a certain degree, leaving my past
life behind and back to the work force, working with people in
senectitude.
If there is one word to summarize my feelings and thoughts for this year, it would be gratitude.
I am grateful for:
1. Being alive
2. Opportunities to learn more about the health care sector in Singapore, especially in the mental health, dementia etc.
3. My family and friends especially during the period which I was
staying at home and dealing with my internal struggle with fear and
mortality.
Last but not least I like to express my gratitude to the most important person of all.
Me.
Great job Eric! You have survived and had grown over the
past one year. You have grown to accept and confront your subconscious
fears especially in the nights. You have grown to embrace your
vulnerabilities more and emerge from the acknowledgement and
confrontation, a stronger individual.
Some of my habitual
tendencies had given rise to difficult times in the past but I am
grateful that I am able to see them more clearly than before in 2016. It
will be some time before I can reach my goal but at least I think I am
slowly inching towards that destination.
2017 will be another journey of self discovery and spiritual progress. Tomorrow will be a new start to a wonderful new year.
May all have a great new year ahead.
May all be well and happy.
With Loving-Kindness
Simple Bear 31.12.2017.
Saturday, December 31, 2016
Thursday, December 29, 2016
人生有如两颗橘子
人生有如两颗橘子
人生际遇有如两颗橘子，一颗大而酸，一颗小而甜。
凡人拿到大的，抱怨橘子酸，拿到甜的，抱怨橘子小。
智者拿到酸的，感谢橘子大，拿到小的，感谢橘子甜。
橘子是甜，是酸，是大，是小，一切全都来自于心。
人生际遇有如两颗橘子，一颗大而酸，一颗小而甜。
凡人拿到大的，抱怨橘子酸，拿到甜的，抱怨橘子小。
智者拿到酸的，感谢橘子大，拿到小的，感谢橘子甜。
橘子是甜，是酸，是大，是小，一切全都来自于心。
蔡志忠 《蒲公英的微笑》
English translation
Life, is akin to having two oranges
Our experiences in life is akin to having two oranges, one which is big but sour, and the other small but sweet.
When the mortal gets the big orange, he complains that the orange is sour; when he gets the sweet orange, he complains that the orange is small.
When the wise gets the sour orange, he is grateful that the orange is big; when he gets the small orange, he is grateful that the orange is sweet.
Oranges, our perception of whether it is sweet, sour, big or small originates from our mind.
Tsai Chih Chung <Smiles of Dandelion>
A rough translation, do pardon if there is any mistakes; my ang moh not good
:P
English translation
Life, is akin to having two oranges
Our experiences in life is akin to having two oranges, one which is big but sour, and the other small but sweet.
When the mortal gets the big orange, he complains that the orange is sour; when he gets the sweet orange, he complains that the orange is small.
When the wise gets the sour orange, he is grateful that the orange is big; when he gets the small orange, he is grateful that the orange is sweet.
Oranges, our perception of whether it is sweet, sour, big or small originates from our mind.
Tsai Chih Chung <Smiles of Dandelion>
A rough translation, do pardon if there is any mistakes; my ang moh not good
:PSunday, December 25, 2016
Belonging
Belonging
Friend: "I am a little lost right now."
Simple Bear: "Why are you lost?"
Friend: "I feel that I don't belong anywhere. I don't feel that I belong to any of the groups in my social circle."
Simple Bear: "I feel that also sometimes."
Friend: "How do you deal with that? I am feeling sad and depressed right now."
Simple Bear: "I ask myself one question."
Friend: "What question?“
Simple Bear: "Where do you think you should belong?"
Friend: o_O ?
Friend: "I am a little lost right now."
Simple Bear: "Why are you lost?"
Friend: "I feel that I don't belong anywhere. I don't feel that I belong to any of the groups in my social circle."
Simple Bear: "I feel that also sometimes."
Friend: "How do you deal with that? I am feeling sad and depressed right now."
Simple Bear: "I ask myself one question."
Friend: "What question?“
Simple Bear: "Where do you think you should belong?"
Friend: o_O ?
Friday, December 23, 2016
求人不如求己
求人不如求己
佛印禅师与苏东坡同游杭州灵隐寺时，到观世音菩萨前，佛印禅师合掌礼拜。
苏东坡问佛印说: "我们求观世音菩萨，为何祂也挂着一串念珠? 观世音菩萨在求谁?"
佛印禅师与苏东坡同游杭州灵隐寺时，到观世音菩萨前，佛印禅师合掌礼拜。
苏东坡问佛印说: "我们求观世音菩萨，为何祂也挂着一串念珠? 观世音菩萨在求谁?"
佛印禅师: "求观世音菩萨啊。"
苏东坡: "观世音菩萨求观世音菩萨?"
佛印禅师: "观世音菩萨比我们还清楚，求人不如求己。"
苏东坡: "观世音菩萨求观世音菩萨?"
佛印禅师: "观世音菩萨比我们还清楚，求人不如求己。"
Sunday, December 4, 2016
Listening
Listening
The perfection of listening requires both the ears and the eyes to work in tandem, with undivided attention of the heart."
Simple Bear 04.12.2016.
The perfection of listening requires both the ears and the eyes to work in tandem, with undivided attention of the heart."
Simple Bear 04.12.2016.
A Piece of Cake
A Piece of Cake
"Come over here." I could read her lips moving to the three words as she gestured with her hand for me to walk over to her.
I walked over, looked at her and said, "Yes M what can I do for you today?"
She pointed to the two pieces of cake in front of her and said, "I want to share the cakes with you. You take one and I will take one."
She smiled.
I was touched by her kindness. It was a birthday celebration for her and other seniors today and she wanted to share her share of her birthday cake with me.
I smiled and said, "Thanks for your kind offer of the cake M they were saying that I am fat *pointing to my tummy* and I need to go on a diet. I can't eat the cake. Please have it."
She laughed and nodded, picking up the cake with relish.
I went away and a few minutes later, she waved at me again and gestured for me to go over.
I walked over and she said, "I want to share the cake with you. I just had one. And there is another piece of the cake left. I want you to have it."
I smiled at her and said, "Thank you for your kind offer M they said I am fat and I need to go on a diet. I can't have the cake. Please have the cake."
She smiled and nodded, picking up the piece of the cake with delight.
I was touched. I had never expected it.
It was clear. She was happy about the birthday celebrations and she was happy eating the cake. I was touched that she had wanted to share her happiness with me.
She may have forgotten that she had offered me the cake twice. Perhaps that is what makes it all the more emotional for me.
I am humbled and grateful for her kindness. The moment, her kindness makes my work in the nursing Home worthwhile.
Maybe to others, it is just a piece of cake, but to me, it is more than just a piece of cake.
May all be well and happy.
With love and kindness
Simple Bear 04.12.2016.
"Come over here." I could read her lips moving to the three words as she gestured with her hand for me to walk over to her.
I walked over, looked at her and said, "Yes M what can I do for you today?"
She pointed to the two pieces of cake in front of her and said, "I want to share the cakes with you. You take one and I will take one."
She smiled.
I was touched by her kindness. It was a birthday celebration for her and other seniors today and she wanted to share her share of her birthday cake with me.
I smiled and said, "Thanks for your kind offer of the cake M they were saying that I am fat *pointing to my tummy* and I need to go on a diet. I can't eat the cake. Please have it."
She laughed and nodded, picking up the cake with relish.
I went away and a few minutes later, she waved at me again and gestured for me to go over.
I walked over and she said, "I want to share the cake with you. I just had one. And there is another piece of the cake left. I want you to have it."
I smiled at her and said, "Thank you for your kind offer M they said I am fat and I need to go on a diet. I can't have the cake. Please have the cake."
She smiled and nodded, picking up the piece of the cake with delight.
I was touched. I had never expected it.
It was clear. She was happy about the birthday celebrations and she was happy eating the cake. I was touched that she had wanted to share her happiness with me.
She may have forgotten that she had offered me the cake twice. Perhaps that is what makes it all the more emotional for me.
I am humbled and grateful for her kindness. The moment, her kindness makes my work in the nursing Home worthwhile.
Maybe to others, it is just a piece of cake, but to me, it is more than just a piece of cake.
May all be well and happy.
With love and kindness
Simple Bear 04.12.2016.
Monday, November 21, 2016
善有善报
善有善报
夜深了，我一人在宁静的街上漫步，反省着过去一个礼拜的行与念。
脑海中浮现了一个问题，人常说善有善报，何谓善报? 人生平常中有善报否?
有。当然有。
善报不局限于生命中有贵人，衣食住行无缺。善报也是善缘，支持善业的因缘。
能见世间苦，是善报。有多少人视而不见，只知只顾自己苦。自己在苦中苦不堪言，不见他人苦，也是常有之事。能助自己从苦中解脱，而因有其缘去助他人是善报。
能因见苦而生其慈悲，善之念，是善报。有多少人视而不见，只知只顾自己好。
能因慈悲，善之念而能有力行其念，是善报。不是有念就能行，有能力帮也是一种善报。
能因起慈悲，善之念，有此能力行，有愿行其行，是善报。不是有此念，有力，就能行。也要有愿行其行，才能有动力行其行，有此愿也是一种善报。
能因起慈悲，善之念，有力可行，有愿行其行，有勇气行其愿，是善报。有时行善之事，是需要作出一些也许社会中不常有之事。例如在雨天中，停下脚步，救一些可能会被人踩死的蜗牛等小动物，别人会觉得你怪怪的。真需要不理会别人眼光的勇气。有时也要有承受好意被他人拒绝的勇气。
能因起慈悲，善之念，有力可行，有愿行其行，有勇气行其愿而他人愿受其心，是善报。苦中的众生愿受其善心也是对于行善之人的一种善报。生活中愿行善而别人不愿领情，那也是常有的事。
想想能成就慈悲，善心之业有多难啊! 需要多少善缘才能成就善业。
每一个因每一段缘都需要感恩。感恩之情也是善报啊!
愿众生幸福安康。
简单熊 21.11.2016.
夜深了，我一人在宁静的街上漫步，反省着过去一个礼拜的行与念。
脑海中浮现了一个问题，人常说善有善报，何谓善报? 人生平常中有善报否?
有。当然有。
善报不局限于生命中有贵人，衣食住行无缺。善报也是善缘，支持善业的因缘。
能见世间苦，是善报。有多少人视而不见，只知只顾自己苦。自己在苦中苦不堪言，不见他人苦，也是常有之事。能助自己从苦中解脱，而因有其缘去助他人是善报。
能因见苦而生其慈悲，善之念，是善报。有多少人视而不见，只知只顾自己好。
能因慈悲，善之念而能有力行其念，是善报。不是有念就能行，有能力帮也是一种善报。
能因起慈悲，善之念，有此能力行，有愿行其行，是善报。不是有此念，有力，就能行。也要有愿行其行，才能有动力行其行，有此愿也是一种善报。
能因起慈悲，善之念，有力可行，有愿行其行，有勇气行其愿，是善报。有时行善之事，是需要作出一些也许社会中不常有之事。例如在雨天中，停下脚步，救一些可能会被人踩死的蜗牛等小动物，别人会觉得你怪怪的。真需要不理会别人眼光的勇气。有时也要有承受好意被他人拒绝的勇气。
能因起慈悲，善之念，有力可行，有愿行其行，有勇气行其愿而他人愿受其心，是善报。苦中的众生愿受其善心也是对于行善之人的一种善报。生活中愿行善而别人不愿领情，那也是常有的事。
想想能成就慈悲，善心之业有多难啊! 需要多少善缘才能成就善业。
每一个因每一段缘都需要感恩。感恩之情也是善报啊!
愿众生幸福安康。
简单熊 21.11.2016.
Thursday, November 10, 2016
为君难
为君难
有人问我对于美国总统选举的结果有何看法。
我想起了圣贤对于权利的智慧。
定公问：“一言而可以兴邦，有诸？”
孔子对曰：“言不可以若是其几也。人之言曰：‘为君难，为臣不易。’如知为君之难也，不几乎一言而兴邦乎？”
曰：“一言而丧邦，有诸？”
孔子对曰：“言不可以若是其几也。人之言曰：‘予无乐乎为君，唯其言而莫予违也。’如其善而莫之违也，不亦善乎？如不善而莫之违也，不几乎一言而丧邦乎？”
孔子《论语• 子路第十三篇》
大局已定。不管谁当选，只希望新的美国总统明白身为美国总统的责任与使命。
身为总统的他是否是个好总统就让未来来评价吧。
而我们又能做什么呢?
观其善而仿之，观其恶而改之。
愿大家幸福安康。
有人问我对于美国总统选举的结果有何看法。
我想起了圣贤对于权利的智慧。
定公问：“一言而可以兴邦，有诸？”
孔子对曰：“言不可以若是其几也。人之言曰：‘为君难，为臣不易。’如知为君之难也，不几乎一言而兴邦乎？”
曰：“一言而丧邦，有诸？”
孔子对曰：“言不可以若是其几也。人之言曰：‘予无乐乎为君，唯其言而莫予违也。’如其善而莫之违也，不亦善乎？如不善而莫之违也，不几乎一言而丧邦乎？”
孔子《论语• 子路第十三篇》
大局已定。不管谁当选，只希望新的美国总统明白身为美国总统的责任与使命。
身为总统的他是否是个好总统就让未来来评价吧。
而我们又能做什么呢?
观其善而仿之，观其恶而改之。
愿大家幸福安康。
Sunday, October 23, 2016
Aging Bear
Aging Bear
Spent the start of my weekend bringing the seniors from a nursing home for breakfast this morning.
A friend told me that someone asked him why is there 11 seniors in the group instead of 10 (referring to me as one of the seniors) as I was eating my breakfast beside the seniors and the majority of the volunteers were standing around watching them eat their breakfast and having their coffee.
I was amused. Did I aged so much? Haha.
It was a good reminder. Every day past is a day older.
If I am lucky enough to reach the age that the seniors are, what kind of a senior will I be? I am subjected to aging, sickness and death but what kind of a man am I in this natural process of aging, sickness and death?
Every day past is a day less to work on ourselves, to ready ourselves for the eventuality.
Excuse me now as the old bear needs to take a nap.
May all be well and happy
With Loving-Kindness
Simple Bear 23.10.2016.
Spent the start of my weekend bringing the seniors from a nursing home for breakfast this morning.
A friend told me that someone asked him why is there 11 seniors in the group instead of 10 (referring to me as one of the seniors) as I was eating my breakfast beside the seniors and the majority of the volunteers were standing around watching them eat their breakfast and having their coffee.
I was amused. Did I aged so much? Haha.
It was a good reminder. Every day past is a day older.
If I am lucky enough to reach the age that the seniors are, what kind of a senior will I be? I am subjected to aging, sickness and death but what kind of a man am I in this natural process of aging, sickness and death?
Every day past is a day less to work on ourselves, to ready ourselves for the eventuality.
Excuse me now as the old bear needs to take a nap.
May all be well and happy
With Loving-Kindness
Simple Bear 23.10.2016.
Sunday, October 16, 2016
The day before the night
The day before the night
Almost 6 months ago, I resigned from my previous job and spent close to 5 months at home, doing nothing but watch Korean entertainment almost every single day.
Not a lot of people knew about my leave from working life and I am grateful for the friends who expressed their concern for me during this period of time. People asked me why do I want to take this break despite the difficult economic outlook; choosing to leave a job which is stable and despite not being well-off financially.
It was a difficult and easy choice at the point of time. it was difficult because I was leaving a job of which I had my own plans and objectives to achieve in the position, to help others who needed help.
It was easy because I knew, at that point of time, the habitual tendencies which was causing me agony in moments of non-mindfulness are still there and they are gaining strength, I needed to work on them.
I am ambitious, not in terms of the monetary rewards, the power and position that society has to offer but in terms of the richness of my spiritual life. Success, to me is peace despite the changes in life prior to death and failure, is sufferings due to the changes in life prior to death.
And it is always a work-in-progress and at that point of time, after the car accident early this year, I felt I needed to take stock of the habitual tendencies that I need to work on and devise my plans to work on them from now til the time.
There are moments of success and there are moments of failure, which are precursors to success and we are the only one who can magically turn failure to success. The only independent factor in this hypothesis of mine is me and the only dependent factor, is me. They are different yet the same.
During this period of time, I dreamed about the old me. The naive young me who seeks solace in the world of knowledge; books become the refuge from the sufferings of the world, the pain and the anguish. The boy who later grew to be a youth who seeks his refuge in the hedonistic pleasures from winning over people in sports, academic achievements etc being in the positive limelight. The competitive streak grew stronger as the teenager grew up to assume his position in the working world.
I woke up, with this question lingering on my mind. What is the one thing in this world that I crave the most? The answer was clear. It was peace. I crave not the hedonistic pleasures of the world, nor the sufferings but of a mind who can experience the pleasures and sufferings of this world without any indulgence.
Then, the logical next question which arises was what were the impediments to achieving this? The habitual tendencies that I had built up over the years especially the competitive streak in me. I still love the competitiveness but I want to change it, to still be competitive with myself and not with others. I have made some progress over the years especially the last two years but sometimes, when I am not mindful, the hydra rears its many heads. It is important to balance the competitive streak with compassion for oneself.
Second, were the expectations. Disappointments were rift in the past and I struggled with it a lot. The idealistic part of me scream inside at the disappointments every single time. I still have expectations of myself and I had learn to slowly stop harboring any expectations of others adhering to my expectations. I think it is important not to be lax with myself but at the same time, there is a need to balance the expectations with compassion for oneself.
Of course there are many more habitual tendencies that I need to work on but this posting will be a book if I start writing in details. I have to admit during this period of time, there were fleeting thoughts of leaving this secular world behind me to work on them but as me, I have responsibilities to take care and I can't allow myself to be irresponsible. Spiritual practice is in the secular.
Finally, it came the time for me to go back to the secular world full-time. I started work in a nursing home a month plus ago and also started meeting up with people, working with different new people a while ago on new volunteering work and I have to say, it takes some time getting used to being back with interacting with people again.
Coming back is like taking an examination, to have an idea of my progress and the points to improve on in the next moment. I have to say, these two months had been quite enjoyable, in terms of the multitude of experiences for introspection.
The sociable and the introvert me. I am back again, on the path between the sunset at the end of the day, and at the cusp of the night, between day and night.
It will be a renewed journey, on the path of peace, to peace.
May all be well and happy.
With Love and Compassion
Simple Bear 16.10.2016
Almost 6 months ago, I resigned from my previous job and spent close to 5 months at home, doing nothing but watch Korean entertainment almost every single day.
Not a lot of people knew about my leave from working life and I am grateful for the friends who expressed their concern for me during this period of time. People asked me why do I want to take this break despite the difficult economic outlook; choosing to leave a job which is stable and despite not being well-off financially.
It was a difficult and easy choice at the point of time. it was difficult because I was leaving a job of which I had my own plans and objectives to achieve in the position, to help others who needed help.
It was easy because I knew, at that point of time, the habitual tendencies which was causing me agony in moments of non-mindfulness are still there and they are gaining strength, I needed to work on them.
I am ambitious, not in terms of the monetary rewards, the power and position that society has to offer but in terms of the richness of my spiritual life. Success, to me is peace despite the changes in life prior to death and failure, is sufferings due to the changes in life prior to death.
And it is always a work-in-progress and at that point of time, after the car accident early this year, I felt I needed to take stock of the habitual tendencies that I need to work on and devise my plans to work on them from now til the time.
There are moments of success and there are moments of failure, which are precursors to success and we are the only one who can magically turn failure to success. The only independent factor in this hypothesis of mine is me and the only dependent factor, is me. They are different yet the same.
During this period of time, I dreamed about the old me. The naive young me who seeks solace in the world of knowledge; books become the refuge from the sufferings of the world, the pain and the anguish. The boy who later grew to be a youth who seeks his refuge in the hedonistic pleasures from winning over people in sports, academic achievements etc being in the positive limelight. The competitive streak grew stronger as the teenager grew up to assume his position in the working world.
I woke up, with this question lingering on my mind. What is the one thing in this world that I crave the most? The answer was clear. It was peace. I crave not the hedonistic pleasures of the world, nor the sufferings but of a mind who can experience the pleasures and sufferings of this world without any indulgence.
Then, the logical next question which arises was what were the impediments to achieving this? The habitual tendencies that I had built up over the years especially the competitive streak in me. I still love the competitiveness but I want to change it, to still be competitive with myself and not with others. I have made some progress over the years especially the last two years but sometimes, when I am not mindful, the hydra rears its many heads. It is important to balance the competitive streak with compassion for oneself.
Second, were the expectations. Disappointments were rift in the past and I struggled with it a lot. The idealistic part of me scream inside at the disappointments every single time. I still have expectations of myself and I had learn to slowly stop harboring any expectations of others adhering to my expectations. I think it is important not to be lax with myself but at the same time, there is a need to balance the expectations with compassion for oneself.
Of course there are many more habitual tendencies that I need to work on but this posting will be a book if I start writing in details. I have to admit during this period of time, there were fleeting thoughts of leaving this secular world behind me to work on them but as me, I have responsibilities to take care and I can't allow myself to be irresponsible. Spiritual practice is in the secular.
Finally, it came the time for me to go back to the secular world full-time. I started work in a nursing home a month plus ago and also started meeting up with people, working with different new people a while ago on new volunteering work and I have to say, it takes some time getting used to being back with interacting with people again.
Coming back is like taking an examination, to have an idea of my progress and the points to improve on in the next moment. I have to say, these two months had been quite enjoyable, in terms of the multitude of experiences for introspection.
The sociable and the introvert me. I am back again, on the path between the sunset at the end of the day, and at the cusp of the night, between day and night.
It will be a renewed journey, on the path of peace, to peace.
May all be well and happy.
With Love and Compassion
Simple Bear 16.10.2016
Saturday, October 15, 2016
Hallucinations
Hallucinations
"The existence of an experience exists only in the experience."
Simple Bear 15.10.2016.
An hallucination, perhaps is just an experience which doesn't conform to collective experience.
"The existence of an experience exists only in the experience."
Simple Bear 15.10.2016.
An hallucination, perhaps is just an experience which doesn't conform to collective experience.
Monday, October 10, 2016
Sanity
Sanity
"Perhaps, sanity is neither the wallowing in the frustrations, pain and sufferings that your world brings, nor the indulgence in the elation, pleasures and hedonistic affect that your world promises; it may be the state of unconditional acceptance, empathetic understanding and the transcendence of both the transitory light and darkness."
Simple Bear 10.10.2016.
"Perhaps, sanity is neither the wallowing in the frustrations, pain and sufferings that your world brings, nor the indulgence in the elation, pleasures and hedonistic affect that your world promises; it may be the state of unconditional acceptance, empathetic understanding and the transcendence of both the transitory light and darkness."
Simple Bear 10.10.2016.
Friday, September 30, 2016
如果
看着车窗外的雨滴，心中起了个念。
有一首歌的歌词是那么写的，"你是好人也是个坏人。"
每个人都有好与不好(坏)的一面。
如果。我是个坏人，那我会因为我本身的何恶念，何恶习性而被人憎恨，给予自己与他人恐惧。
我会因何恶念而痛苦。
此念该断，不可任长。此习性该改，不应放任。
如果。我是个好人，那我会因为我本身的何善念，何善习性而被人爱戴，给予自己与他人幸福。
我会因何善念而安心。
此念该护，照料成长。此习性该持，应护增长。
别因为此恶念尚不成器而忽视它; 恶念成器时，悔已迟。
别因为此善念尚不成器而遗忘它; 善念闪而过，悔已迟。
持善弃恶难但一切从一念而起。
愿众幸福快乐。
简单熊 30.09.2016.
看着车窗外的雨滴，心中起了个念。
有一首歌的歌词是那么写的，"你是好人也是个坏人。"
每个人都有好与不好(坏)的一面。
如果。我是个坏人，那我会因为我本身的何恶念，何恶习性而被人憎恨，给予自己与他人恐惧。
我会因何恶念而痛苦。
此念该断，不可任长。此习性该改，不应放任。
如果。我是个好人，那我会因为我本身的何善念，何善习性而被人爱戴，给予自己与他人幸福。
我会因何善念而安心。
此念该护，照料成长。此习性该持，应护增长。
别因为此恶念尚不成器而忽视它; 恶念成器时，悔已迟。
别因为此善念尚不成器而遗忘它; 善念闪而过，悔已迟。
持善弃恶难但一切从一念而起。
愿众幸福快乐。
简单熊 30.09.2016.
Wednesday, September 28, 2016
Tuesday, September 27, 2016
对与错 II
对与错 II
友人: "你用那母亲为儿女的例子不妥，人是有感情的。
简单熊: 好。如果有一列载满一百人的火车在十多秒后会掉落悬崖，唯一能阻止悲剧发生的是用肉身去挡火车，让火车停止。有两个人在轨道边，A先生与B先生，他们互相不识; B比较靠近轨道。A在没有B的同意下把B推到在轨道上阻挡了火车, B因此死去但火车上的人获救。你觉得A是对还是错?
友人:
-_-!
友人: "你用那母亲为儿女的例子不妥，人是有感情的。
简单熊: 好。如果有一列载满一百人的火车在十多秒后会掉落悬崖，唯一能阻止悲剧发生的是用肉身去挡火车，让火车停止。有两个人在轨道边，A先生与B先生，他们互相不识; B比较靠近轨道。A在没有B的同意下把B推到在轨道上阻挡了火车, B因此死去但火车上的人获救。你觉得A是对还是错?
友人:
-_-!Sunday, September 25, 2016
无趣，单身
无趣，单身
友人: "说真的。你的脸书的更新总是一些像是人生大道理与感悟，女生会觉得无趣。女生会觉得你很严肃有距离感。如果你想脱离单身就写些有趣的东西吧?"
简单熊: "哈哈。多谢关心。无谓。
友人: "为何?"
简单熊: "何谓?"
友人: "你，真心不想脱单吗?"
简单熊: "哈哈。你应该先关心你自己吧。你和我在脸书上载的东西不同但女生也认为你应该和我一样无趣吧?"
友人: "为何。"
简单熊: "哈哈。"
友人: -_-*
有趣也好无趣也罢，心安幸福就好。
感恩。
友人: "说真的。你的脸书的更新总是一些像是人生大道理与感悟，女生会觉得无趣。女生会觉得你很严肃有距离感。如果你想脱离单身就写些有趣的东西吧?"
简单熊: "哈哈。多谢关心。无谓。
友人: "为何?"
简单熊: "何谓?"
友人: "你，真心不想脱单吗?"
简单熊: "哈哈。你应该先关心你自己吧。你和我在脸书上载的东西不同但女生也认为你应该和我一样无趣吧?"
友人: "为何。"
简单熊: "哈哈。"
友人: -_-*
有趣也好无趣也罢，心安幸福就好。
感恩。
Thursday, September 22, 2016
对与错
对与错
友人: "什么是对的事; 什么是错的事?"
简单熊: "无绝对。"
友人: "你讲了等于没有讲。事情一定有对错之绝对。"
简单熊: "如果有一位母亲偷了别人的食物，为了喂饱快饿死的孩子， 你觉得是对还是错?"
友人:-_-!
友人: "什么是对的事; 什么是错的事?"
简单熊: "无绝对。"
友人: "你讲了等于没有讲。事情一定有对错之绝对。"
简单熊: "如果有一位母亲偷了别人的食物，为了喂饱快饿死的孩子， 你觉得是对还是错?"
友人:
-_-!
Tuesday, September 20, 2016
Saturday, September 17, 2016
Tuesday, September 13, 2016
呐喊
呐喊
第一声 请不要不理我 我只是健忘
第二声 请不要讨厌我 我只是糊涂
第三声 请不要不要我 我只是迷茫
第四声 请不要放弃我 我只是害怕
第五声 请不要忘记我 我只是忘了
简单熊 《被自己遗忘的自己》
第一声 请不要不理我 我只是健忘
第二声 请不要讨厌我 我只是糊涂
第三声 请不要不要我 我只是迷茫
第四声 请不要放弃我 我只是害怕
第五声 请不要忘记我 我只是忘了
简单熊 《被自己遗忘的自己》
Sunday, September 11, 2016
Alone.
Friend: "You spend a lot of time alone. You even eat alone during lunch time. Don't you get bored?"
Simple Bear: "It is not boring. In fact it can be quite entertaining."
Friend: "Entertaining? I don't see how entertaining can it get, being alone. Unless you play with your phone, watch dramas etc"
Simple Bear: "Even without your phone, it can be quite entertaining. The entertainment comes in stages. First, you get entertained by the world around you. Then slowly, you get entertained by the world within you. Then after that, you get entertained by the silence."
Friend: "Entertained by silence?"
Simple Bear: "Yes. Silence is enjoyable too"
Friend:-_-!
May all be well and happy
Simple Bear 11.09.2017.
Friend: "You spend a lot of time alone. You even eat alone during lunch time. Don't you get bored?"
Simple Bear: "It is not boring. In fact it can be quite entertaining."
Friend: "Entertaining? I don't see how entertaining can it get, being alone. Unless you play with your phone, watch dramas etc"
Simple Bear: "Even without your phone, it can be quite entertaining. The entertainment comes in stages. First, you get entertained by the world around you. Then slowly, you get entertained by the world within you. Then after that, you get entertained by the silence."
Friend: "Entertained by silence?"
Simple Bear: "Yes. Silence is enjoyable too"
Friend:
-_-!May all be well and happy
Simple Bear 11.09.2017.
Friday, September 9, 2016
My Name is Not Winnie
My Name is Not Winnie
Got on the bus to meet a friend for breakfast. I was sitting behind two young girls, siblings. As I sat down, the younger girl (probably in kindergarten) turn to look at me with a stuffed Eeyore in her hands, as if she wanted me to participate in her imagination game as an audience. Her sister, slightly older was visibly embarrassed, initially at her sister's actions.
She asked her sister to stop looking at me. And then, she turned around and looked at me, I was smiling at them. I was finding this entire situation rather amusing. She realized that I was not in any way displeased with the behavior, smiled back and picked up the Eeyore. Both of them took turns displaying the Eeyore in front of me throughout the entire journey.
They kept putting the Eeyore in front of me throughout the entire journey.
Maybe they think I am Winnie the Pooh.
Got on the bus to meet a friend for breakfast. I was sitting behind two young girls, siblings. As I sat down, the younger girl (probably in kindergarten) turn to look at me with a stuffed Eeyore in her hands, as if she wanted me to participate in her imagination game as an audience. Her sister, slightly older was visibly embarrassed, initially at her sister's actions.
She asked her sister to stop looking at me. And then, she turned around and looked at me, I was smiling at them. I was finding this entire situation rather amusing. She realized that I was not in any way displeased with the behavior, smiled back and picked up the Eeyore. Both of them took turns displaying the Eeyore in front of me throughout the entire journey.
They kept putting the Eeyore in front of me throughout the entire journey.
Maybe they think I am Winnie the Pooh.
Sunday, September 4, 2016
Saturday, August 27, 2016
Be the Sun
Be the Sun.
A friend had recently confided in me an issue he had.
Friend: "I need you advice. I have a close friend who had cultivated some bad habits. I tried to save him from destroying himself but its difficult. Any way I can save him?"
Simple Bear: "Don't save him."
Friend: "And leave him to walk towards his own demise? I can't do it."
Simple Bear: "I mean don't have the mentality of being a savior. We are the only ones who can save ourselves; no one else can. He is the only one who can save himself. We can only facilitate the process of him saving himself through support."
Friend: "But I can't just ignore him."
Simple Bear: "Do your best. Be there for him. If he doesn't develop any self awareness or insight into his own problems, there is a limit to what others can do for him. It is like a person lost in an underground maze but doesn't realize that he is lost. Be like the sun in the sky at the end of the maze to guide him into the sunlight. Till then, if he doesn't realize that he is lost, telling him that he is lost may not work."
Friend: "Just be the sun."
Simple Bear: "Yes. You need to be self-illuminating."
Friend:-_-!
To light up the worlds of others, we must first light up our own worlds by ourselves, to be our own Suns.
May all be well and happy.
With Loving-Kindness
Simple Bear 27.08.2016.
A friend had recently confided in me an issue he had.
Friend: "I need you advice. I have a close friend who had cultivated some bad habits. I tried to save him from destroying himself but its difficult. Any way I can save him?"
Simple Bear: "Don't save him."
Friend: "And leave him to walk towards his own demise? I can't do it."
Simple Bear: "I mean don't have the mentality of being a savior. We are the only ones who can save ourselves; no one else can. He is the only one who can save himself. We can only facilitate the process of him saving himself through support."
Friend: "But I can't just ignore him."
Simple Bear: "Do your best. Be there for him. If he doesn't develop any self awareness or insight into his own problems, there is a limit to what others can do for him. It is like a person lost in an underground maze but doesn't realize that he is lost. Be like the sun in the sky at the end of the maze to guide him into the sunlight. Till then, if he doesn't realize that he is lost, telling him that he is lost may not work."
Friend: "Just be the sun."
Simple Bear: "Yes. You need to be self-illuminating."
Friend:
-_-!To light up the worlds of others, we must first light up our own worlds by ourselves, to be our own Suns.
May all be well and happy.
With Loving-Kindness
Simple Bear 27.08.2016.
Sunday, August 7, 2016
Pokemon Go (A Life Perspective from a Bear's Perspective)
Pokemon Go (A Life Perspective from a Bear's Perspective)
Yes. The craze is here. Everyone is out in the streets, in the parks, in the malls looking for the cute pokemons.
The eccentric bear in me was thinking about how the augumented reality Pokemon Go game relates to our reality.
Disclaimer: the following perspectives is from a non-player's limited understanding of the game.
Pokemons
The cute creatures are like the positive values e.g. empathy and compassion in our lives. We need to go around to find opportunities such as doing volunteering work to 'catch them all' The values (pokemons) may arise (appear) anywhere, anytime; we need to be aware to 'catch them within'
Pokemon Gyms
The gyms are like our daily interactions with everyone especially in difficult situations and people (strong pokemon gym leaders) in which we can have an opportunity to train ourselves and 'grown the values (pokemons) within'
Pokemon Stops
The stops are like opportunities in which we can learn skills e.g. meditation, mindfulness techniques (pokeballs) to help us in 'catching more values (pokemons)' in our daily lives. We need to have self-awareness to 'catch and grow the positive values within'
The pokemon eggs are like concepts e.g. compassion and empathetic joy, values that we can learn theoretically and grow within (the hatching and growing of pokemons).
Pokemon Go Incense
The incense is like generating positivity within. I believe adopting positivity (utilizing incense items) will attracts positivity (pokemons). When we are positive (utilizing incense items), we are more likely to be aware and notice the positivity (pokemons) around us.
Of course there is the risk of injuries in the craze of catching pokemons. Likewise in the cultivation of values (training of pokemons), we need to take care of ourselves. In the 'craze' to cultivate (train), we may just do the opposite and hurt ourselves and others in the process.
While everyone is catching pokemons outside
I think I will get myself busy in finding my opportunities. Have a safe and good time everyone. Be well and happy.
With Loving-Kindness
Simple Bear 07.08.2016.
Yes. The craze is here. Everyone is out in the streets, in the parks, in the malls looking for the cute pokemons.
The eccentric bear in me was thinking about how the augumented reality Pokemon Go game relates to our reality.
Disclaimer: the following perspectives is from a non-player's limited understanding of the game.
Pokemons
The cute creatures are like the positive values e.g. empathy and compassion in our lives. We need to go around to find opportunities such as doing volunteering work to 'catch them all' The values (pokemons) may arise (appear) anywhere, anytime; we need to be aware to 'catch them within'
Pokemon Gyms
The gyms are like our daily interactions with everyone especially in difficult situations and people (strong pokemon gym leaders) in which we can have an opportunity to train ourselves and 'grown the values (pokemons) within'
Pokemon Stops
The stops are like opportunities in which we can learn skills e.g. meditation, mindfulness techniques (pokeballs) to help us in 'catching more values (pokemons)' in our daily lives. We need to have self-awareness to 'catch and grow the positive values within'
The pokemon eggs are like concepts e.g. compassion and empathetic joy, values that we can learn theoretically and grow within (the hatching and growing of pokemons).
Pokemon Go Incense
The incense is like generating positivity within. I believe adopting positivity (utilizing incense items) will attracts positivity (pokemons). When we are positive (utilizing incense items), we are more likely to be aware and notice the positivity (pokemons) around us.
Of course there is the risk of injuries in the craze of catching pokemons. Likewise in the cultivation of values (training of pokemons), we need to take care of ourselves. In the 'craze' to cultivate (train), we may just do the opposite and hurt ourselves and others in the process.
While everyone is catching pokemons outside
I think I will get myself busy in finding my opportunities. Have a safe and good time everyone. Be well and happy.
With Loving-Kindness
Simple Bear 07.08.2016.
Wednesday, July 20, 2016
Interpretation of a dream.
Interpretation of a dream.
Woke up in the middle of the night with my heart racing.
It was a vivid dream.
In the dream, there was a man filled with egoistic rage, wishing to destroy the worlds and there was another man, filled with pain, wishing to save the worlds.
The dream ended when the man, filled with pain invokes a 'curse' by sacrificing his life, condemning the man, filled with anger, to be trapped in a mirror.
In the dream, I can feel what the anger and also the pain. I was both. It was as if I took turns acting as one in the moment and another in the next.
As I woke up and sat in my bed, feeling the anger in one moment, and the pain in another, I remembered I had a similar dream once, a couple of months ago. In the earlier dream, the two men were there but the ending is different. The man, filled with rage was torturing the man, filled with pain. Both seems so real.
Instinctively, my breaths slowed down as I sat at the edge of my bed. The anger and the pain ebbed away. I could feel myself slowly coming back to this sensory world; I could feel the touch of my body with the fabric of the bed, the smell of rain, the sound of the rain drops outside the windows.
The question arises. Was it just a meaningless dream? Or does it have a more metaphorical meaning behind it?
What is the possibility of two dreams with the same characters with different endings occurring in a time period?
It was the manifestation of my thoughts, my emotions. I was both.
In the earlier dream, the man filled with anger was my own frustrations with my own expectations and disappointments, which manifested itself as the man, filled with pain. I was 'torturing myself' with my own unfulfilled expectations. Subconsciously, I was struggling within but denying it externally. The anger (frustrations) was the pain (disappointments with expectations).
The dream last night was symbolic of the fruit of my struggles. Giving up my expectations, the disappointments and the frustrations which accompanied it, diminishes within. It was only a momentary victory, I have not gone beyond them yet; the mirror is symbolic of introspection. It is a reminder that peace within requires constant awareness and introspection, like the first light of dawn, which breaks the darkness of the night.
"The future is unknown, have faith in peace as your company; even when the end is near, there is no fear."
Simple Bear 21.07.2016.
I fell asleep again, with peace as my blanket covering me. And I woke up to a new self again, with the morning light illuminating my room. Grateful.
May all be well and happy.
With Loving-Kindness
Simple Bear
Woke up in the middle of the night with my heart racing.
It was a vivid dream.
In the dream, there was a man filled with egoistic rage, wishing to destroy the worlds and there was another man, filled with pain, wishing to save the worlds.
The dream ended when the man, filled with pain invokes a 'curse' by sacrificing his life, condemning the man, filled with anger, to be trapped in a mirror.
In the dream, I can feel what the anger and also the pain. I was both. It was as if I took turns acting as one in the moment and another in the next.
As I woke up and sat in my bed, feeling the anger in one moment, and the pain in another, I remembered I had a similar dream once, a couple of months ago. In the earlier dream, the two men were there but the ending is different. The man, filled with rage was torturing the man, filled with pain. Both seems so real.
Instinctively, my breaths slowed down as I sat at the edge of my bed. The anger and the pain ebbed away. I could feel myself slowly coming back to this sensory world; I could feel the touch of my body with the fabric of the bed, the smell of rain, the sound of the rain drops outside the windows.
The question arises. Was it just a meaningless dream? Or does it have a more metaphorical meaning behind it?
What is the possibility of two dreams with the same characters with different endings occurring in a time period?
It was the manifestation of my thoughts, my emotions. I was both.
In the earlier dream, the man filled with anger was my own frustrations with my own expectations and disappointments, which manifested itself as the man, filled with pain. I was 'torturing myself' with my own unfulfilled expectations. Subconsciously, I was struggling within but denying it externally. The anger (frustrations) was the pain (disappointments with expectations).
The dream last night was symbolic of the fruit of my struggles. Giving up my expectations, the disappointments and the frustrations which accompanied it, diminishes within. It was only a momentary victory, I have not gone beyond them yet; the mirror is symbolic of introspection. It is a reminder that peace within requires constant awareness and introspection, like the first light of dawn, which breaks the darkness of the night.
"The future is unknown, have faith in peace as your company; even when the end is near, there is no fear."
Simple Bear 21.07.2016.
I fell asleep again, with peace as my blanket covering me. And I woke up to a new self again, with the morning light illuminating my room. Grateful.
May all be well and happy.
With Loving-Kindness
Simple Bear
Volunteering
Volunteering
"Volunteering is the sharing of happiness."
Simple Bear 20.07.2016.
The sharing is mutual. When volunteers spend their time and effort to share their happiness with others, they also receive happiness shared by those they shared their happiness with in the process.
And that is something to be grateful for; for happiness to arise in oneself and others, conditions must be optimal.
May all be well and happy.
With loving-kindness
Simple Bear 20.07.2016.
P. S. Inspired by a conversation with a friend on perspectives of volunteering during a volunteering session. Grateful for the inspiration.
"Volunteering is the sharing of happiness."
Simple Bear 20.07.2016.
The sharing is mutual. When volunteers spend their time and effort to share their happiness with others, they also receive happiness shared by those they shared their happiness with in the process.
And that is something to be grateful for; for happiness to arise in oneself and others, conditions must be optimal.
May all be well and happy.
With loving-kindness
Simple Bear 20.07.2016.
P. S. Inspired by a conversation with a friend on perspectives of volunteering during a volunteering session. Grateful for the inspiration.
Saturday, June 25, 2016
Goodbye me
Goodbye me
Spent my afternoon accompanying the elderly at two elderly homes.
One of them spoke to me about his life story, his time as an apprentice in the 1970s, his time in the shipyard; From his smile, I knew he had enjoyed his youth. He spoke to me about his beliefs, his philosophies in life. He told me how the rise of capitalism, and focus on the individual had eroded the very value-fabric of society that he once enjoyed his youth in. And as he speaks, tears filled his eyes.
I could feel his concern for his fellow men.
He told me that he has dementia and is slowly forgetting the things that matters to him. He smiled but
I can sense his fear; his fear of forgetting all which makes him, him.
Goodbye Me
Goodbye I say, gently to me
My memories of me
My youth, my love, my life
There is no need for any more words
Cause I won't remember anyway
Say if you must
Before the next moment come
Cause I can't promise
Beyond now.
Don't be sad I am leaving
Piece by piece
Till I can't be heard any longer
At the end, what is left
Is only a picture of the former
The wind still the whispers fall
Say goodbye, goodbye me
Thanks for inspiring this reflection Uncle. Hope you live your life as happy as you can till the time comes.
May all be well and happy.
Simple Bear 25.06.2016.
Spent my afternoon accompanying the elderly at two elderly homes.
One of them spoke to me about his life story, his time as an apprentice in the 1970s, his time in the shipyard; From his smile, I knew he had enjoyed his youth. He spoke to me about his beliefs, his philosophies in life. He told me how the rise of capitalism, and focus on the individual had eroded the very value-fabric of society that he once enjoyed his youth in. And as he speaks, tears filled his eyes.
I could feel his concern for his fellow men.
He told me that he has dementia and is slowly forgetting the things that matters to him. He smiled but
I can sense his fear; his fear of forgetting all which makes him, him.
Goodbye Me
Goodbye I say, gently to me
My memories of me
My youth, my love, my life
There is no need for any more words
Cause I won't remember anyway
Say if you must
Before the next moment come
Cause I can't promise
Beyond now.
Don't be sad I am leaving
Piece by piece
Till I can't be heard any longer
At the end, what is left
Is only a picture of the former
The wind still the whispers fall
Say goodbye, goodbye me
Thanks for inspiring this reflection Uncle. Hope you live your life as happy as you can till the time comes.
May all be well and happy.
Simple Bear 25.06.2016.
Tuesday, June 14, 2016
Am I a Teddy Bear?
Am I a Teddy Bear?
Got a seat on the train beside a young mother with a toddler in a pram.
I was doing my readings on my phone when I noticed the child looking at me with her big round eyes. I smiled back.
Got a seat on the train beside a young mother with a toddler in a pram.
I was doing my readings on my phone when I noticed the child looking at me with her big round eyes. I smiled back.
A minute or so later.
I felt a pair of tiny hands on my big fat right thigh.
I looked at the cute toddler and she was trying to grab onto my thigh, like grabbing the leg of a teddy bear.
Her mother was embarrassed, trying to stop her.
I am not a teddy bear. I am not a toy.
I decided it was inappropriate to stare at the toddler with fury in my eyes. She will get tired of trying.
After some time, she stopped. I guess she finally understand that my thighs are too fat to be grabbed.
And this is not the first time this happened. I guess next time when people asked whether I am good with babies, I can tell them I think I am. They may think I am a teddy bear.
I felt a pair of tiny hands on my big fat right thigh.
I looked at the cute toddler and she was trying to grab onto my thigh, like grabbing the leg of a teddy bear.
Her mother was embarrassed, trying to stop her.
I am not a teddy bear. I am not a toy.
I decided it was inappropriate to stare at the toddler with fury in my eyes. She will get tired of trying.
After some time, she stopped. I guess she finally understand that my thighs are too fat to be grabbed.
And this is not the first time this happened. I guess next time when people asked whether I am good with babies, I can tell them I think I am. They may think I am a teddy bear.
Right and Wrong.
Right and Wrong.
Been reading a lot of articles about the various hate crime and messages around the world, reminded me of a conversation that I had a while ago with an acquaintance, A. He asked me what is the definition of right and wrong in the sphere of perspective relativity.
A: "Everyone has their own definition of what constitutes right and wrong, in the sphere of religions, philosophies and cultures. What is exactly right and wrong? Is there an absolute?"
Simple Bear: "The way we view the world is relative. I can't speak for others; I can only speak for myself. If I said there is an absolute, not all will agree; if I said there is not, not all will agree. What is the utility in clinging on to the word 'absolute'? What do we want out of the desire for an absolute definition of right and wrong? Everyone may have their own reasons to desire so. Perhaps, that in itself, is absolute"
A: (*irritated) "So, what is your definition of right and wrong?"
Simple Bear: "Not harming oneself and others is right; harming oneself and others is wrong."
A: "That's all?
Simple Bear: "That is my absolute."
A:-_-!
Not all will agree but at least I do.
May those who had suffered from hate find love and peace.
May all be well and happy.
Simple Bear 14.06.2016.
Been reading a lot of articles about the various hate crime and messages around the world, reminded me of a conversation that I had a while ago with an acquaintance, A. He asked me what is the definition of right and wrong in the sphere of perspective relativity.
A: "Everyone has their own definition of what constitutes right and wrong, in the sphere of religions, philosophies and cultures. What is exactly right and wrong? Is there an absolute?"
Simple Bear: "The way we view the world is relative. I can't speak for others; I can only speak for myself. If I said there is an absolute, not all will agree; if I said there is not, not all will agree. What is the utility in clinging on to the word 'absolute'? What do we want out of the desire for an absolute definition of right and wrong? Everyone may have their own reasons to desire so. Perhaps, that in itself, is absolute"
A: (*irritated) "So, what is your definition of right and wrong?"
Simple Bear: "Not harming oneself and others is right; harming oneself and others is wrong."
A: "That's all?
Simple Bear: "That is my absolute."
A:
-_-!Not all will agree but at least I do.
May those who had suffered from hate find love and peace.
May all be well and happy.
Simple Bear 14.06.2016.
Sunday, June 12, 2016
Death and Choice
Death and Choice
I was having a conversation with a new friend on career choices.
New Friend: "Why do you want to continue your career in the social service sector?"
Simple Bear: "Because it is aligned with my life goal of helping others."
New Friend: "Are you sure about it as your life goal?"
Simple Bear: "Yes. I went through the process of affirming the goal a lot of times."
New Friend: "How can you be sure that this is your life goal?"
Simple Bear: "It is salient in my mind when I contemplate on my own death. When death approaches, what will you hope your life would be? Don't think that death is far, in fact we are all counting down to it every moment."
New Friend:-_-!
I guess he was not used to my way of expression.:p
P. S. Just in case people are wondering why am I sharing this. I am writing this as a reminder on defining our lives through contemplating on our death. The focus is not on the afterlife but this very life that we have now.
"Life derives its meaning from death; and death, from life."
Simple Bear 12.06.2016.
May all be well and happy.
Simple Bear 12.06.2016.
I was having a conversation with a new friend on career choices.
New Friend: "Why do you want to continue your career in the social service sector?"
Simple Bear: "Because it is aligned with my life goal of helping others."
New Friend: "Are you sure about it as your life goal?"
Simple Bear: "Yes. I went through the process of affirming the goal a lot of times."
New Friend: "How can you be sure that this is your life goal?"
Simple Bear: "It is salient in my mind when I contemplate on my own death. When death approaches, what will you hope your life would be? Don't think that death is far, in fact we are all counting down to it every moment."
New Friend:
-_-!I guess he was not used to my way of expression.
:pP. S. Just in case people are wondering why am I sharing this. I am writing this as a reminder on defining our lives through contemplating on our death. The focus is not on the afterlife but this very life that we have now.
"Life derives its meaning from death; and death, from life."
Simple Bear 12.06.2016.
May all be well and happy.
Simple Bear 12.06.2016.
Friday, May 6, 2016
Monday, April 11, 2016
Monday, April 4, 2016
Sunday, March 20, 2016
Perhaps, we are here to love
Perhaps, we are here to love
Spent the morning visiting a few elderly. Had a great chat with them on a beautiful Sunday morning.
They taught me a precious lesson on love today.
The first was an elderly couple, the uncle was in his 90s and the auntie was in her late 80s. The uncle has visual and mobility difficulties, and when the uncle was chatting with us, the auntie who has auditory difficulties, was there smiling.
Both of them were really positive when they talked about how because of uncle's mobility difficulties, they are unable to go far, and they were smiling when they talked about being each others' support, and how they are satisfied with their lives in the company of their loved ones.
The second was an elder in his 90s. The elder had mobility difficulties but was jovial and kind. He told me his life story, and the part which struck me was when he spoke about his wife, his eyes sparkled with love. He told me how his wife insisted on marrying him during the 1950s despite him telling her that he was engaged through a marriage proposal made by his parents in Taiwan. He choose to marry his wife and decided to call off his proposed marriage in Taiwan despite the possibility of incurring the displeasure of his parents.
He laughed when he mentioned that his wife loved him a lot.
I was touched.
Sometimes, life is really simple. Perhaps, the objective of life is to love; the only difference lies in the person of our affection.
It may be ourselves, our families, loved ones, or the world.
I am grateful for the opportunity to witness and listen to the elders share on their love. Sometimes, it is unspoken, seen through the actions which speaks the language of love. May they continue to love and be loved.
Maybe, just maybe we are all here to love.
May all be well and happy.
With loving-kindness
Simple Bear 20.03.2016.
Spent the morning visiting a few elderly. Had a great chat with them on a beautiful Sunday morning.
They taught me a precious lesson on love today.
The first was an elderly couple, the uncle was in his 90s and the auntie was in her late 80s. The uncle has visual and mobility difficulties, and when the uncle was chatting with us, the auntie who has auditory difficulties, was there smiling.
Both of them were really positive when they talked about how because of uncle's mobility difficulties, they are unable to go far, and they were smiling when they talked about being each others' support, and how they are satisfied with their lives in the company of their loved ones.
The second was an elder in his 90s. The elder had mobility difficulties but was jovial and kind. He told me his life story, and the part which struck me was when he spoke about his wife, his eyes sparkled with love. He told me how his wife insisted on marrying him during the 1950s despite him telling her that he was engaged through a marriage proposal made by his parents in Taiwan. He choose to marry his wife and decided to call off his proposed marriage in Taiwan despite the possibility of incurring the displeasure of his parents.
He laughed when he mentioned that his wife loved him a lot.
I was touched.
Sometimes, life is really simple. Perhaps, the objective of life is to love; the only difference lies in the person of our affection.
It may be ourselves, our families, loved ones, or the world.
I am grateful for the opportunity to witness and listen to the elders share on their love. Sometimes, it is unspoken, seen through the actions which speaks the language of love. May they continue to love and be loved.
Maybe, just maybe we are all here to love.
May all be well and happy.
With loving-kindness
Simple Bear 20.03.2016.
Friday, March 18, 2016
一碗粥，一滴眼泪
一碗粥，一滴眼泪
其实我真的不想吃这一碗鱼圓粥。它提醒着我这是近三十几天以来，我第三次入院。今早，头晕，差点昏过去的我决定放弃与同事们参加今天部门欢聚活动，独自一人来到了医院。
独自躺在观察病房的时候，我听见了其他病人痛苦的声音，有些哭述着身体的痛处，有些哭述着心灵的痛苦。听着，听着，一滴眼泪不禁流了下来。
其实我真的不想吃这一碗鱼圓粥。它提醒着我这是近三十几天以来，我第三次入院。今早，头晕，差点昏过去的我决定放弃与同事们参加今天部门欢聚活动，独自一人来到了医院。
独自躺在观察病房的时候，我听见了其他病人痛苦的声音，有些哭述着身体的痛处，有些哭述着心灵的痛苦。听着，听着，一滴眼泪不禁流了下来。
自己的痛楚不算什么。
口中念着佛号，希望大家能够远离痛苦，得欢喜快乐。
一片宁静充满了心，感觉痛苦渐渐的远离心了。
这时，一位阿姨用着很慈祥的双眼看着我，对我说，"今天的午餐是鱼圓片粥，你想吃吗?"
我微笑的点点头。
看着这一碗粥，心里想着原来痛苦中，生起同理心，感恩心，痛苦就会少点。
心中痛苦少了，幸福就有空间住进心里了。
P.S.感谢各位的关爱。我已经出院了，现在在家里休息了。感恩。
口中念着佛号，希望大家能够远离痛苦，得欢喜快乐。
一片宁静充满了心，感觉痛苦渐渐的远离心了。
这时，一位阿姨用着很慈祥的双眼看着我，对我说，"今天的午餐是鱼圓片粥，你想吃吗?"
我微笑的点点头。
看着这一碗粥，心里想着原来痛苦中，生起同理心，感恩心，痛苦就会少点。
心中痛苦少了，幸福就有空间住进心里了。
P.S.感谢各位的关爱。我已经出院了，现在在家里休息了。感恩。
Wednesday, March 16, 2016
Tuesday, March 15, 2016
The World
The World
Friend: "Sometimes I think you are too idealistic for the world."
Bear: *laughs* "Yes. Perhaps. That is why I live in my world."
Friend: o_O ?
Simple Bear 15.03.2016.
Friend: "Sometimes I think you are too idealistic for the world."
Bear: *laughs* "Yes. Perhaps. That is why I live in my world."
Friend: o_O ?
Simple Bear 15.03.2016.
Monday, March 14, 2016
Impact of Stressful Event on a Bear (Case Study)
Impact of Stressful Event on a Bear (Case Study)
Disclaimer: the following post is a narration of an experiential experiment by an eccentric bear, and does not apply to humans; please do see a mental health professional if you are experiencing mental health issues.
The car accident offered me not only an opportunity to evaluate the priorities in my life but also an opportunity to study myself on the psychological aftereffect of a stressful event.
In case, you are wondering (especially for those of you who studied Psychology), I did monitor myself for symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) for the past few weeks.
The first few days were emotionally tiring, I experienced the arising of anxiety and fear whenever I am on public transportation e.g. buses or taxis. I clutched tightly to the handles on the buses, especially when the ride was bumpy. I asked taxi uncles to start driving only when I put on my seat belts and drive slow on public roads even if the roads are empty. I was hypervigilant when I am on the road. I experienced anxiety arising when I read news of accidents.
I avoided the site of the accident as much as I can. In the event, I have to go past the road, anxiety
arises accompanied by similar emotional memory.
I managed by meditating, I focus my attention on the physiological signs of the anxiety e.g. increasing heart beats as it arises and falls, slowly spreading tension throughout the body and then slowly ebbed away.
It was overwhelming at first but slowly, I began to get the hang of it. Watching the physiological signs every time it arises and falls, and over time, watching also the accompanying thoughts e.g. fear of the repeat of the accident as it arises and falls with the rhythm of the heart.
I monitored my motivation in my favorite activities, my productivity and concentration at work, my social interactions for signs of declining interest, dysfunctionality. There wasn't any salient changes.
I monitored my dreams for flashbacks. There wasn't any.
The hypervigilance and avoidance continued for the next few weeks but it slowly gotten lesser and lesser in frequency and intensity.
After the first few days, when I slowly got myself being increasingly aware of the arising of anxiety and fear, I began to systematically gain control of my body by putting it in a more relaxed state and also reinterpreting the event memory by imbuing the memory with feelings of gratitude for everyone being fine, for having a second chance to practice being a human.
Slowly after, the anxiety and fear decreases in their frequency and intensity and every time, after filling my thoughts associated with the event memory with gratitude, I started filling the following thoughts with loving-kindness, wishing for all to be well and happy.
This is the fourth week. I am feeling much better now, having been able to reach a state in which I can write about the experience. My body doesn't react as intensely as it did during the initial period after the accident.
This too shall pass.
May all be well and happy.
With Loving-Kindness
Simple Bear 14.03.2016.
Disclaimer: the following post is a narration of an experiential experiment by an eccentric bear, and does not apply to humans; please do see a mental health professional if you are experiencing mental health issues.
The car accident offered me not only an opportunity to evaluate the priorities in my life but also an opportunity to study myself on the psychological aftereffect of a stressful event.
In case, you are wondering (especially for those of you who studied Psychology), I did monitor myself for symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) for the past few weeks.
The first few days were emotionally tiring, I experienced the arising of anxiety and fear whenever I am on public transportation e.g. buses or taxis. I clutched tightly to the handles on the buses, especially when the ride was bumpy. I asked taxi uncles to start driving only when I put on my seat belts and drive slow on public roads even if the roads are empty. I was hypervigilant when I am on the road. I experienced anxiety arising when I read news of accidents.
I avoided the site of the accident as much as I can. In the event, I have to go past the road, anxiety
arises accompanied by similar emotional memory.
I managed by meditating, I focus my attention on the physiological signs of the anxiety e.g. increasing heart beats as it arises and falls, slowly spreading tension throughout the body and then slowly ebbed away.
It was overwhelming at first but slowly, I began to get the hang of it. Watching the physiological signs every time it arises and falls, and over time, watching also the accompanying thoughts e.g. fear of the repeat of the accident as it arises and falls with the rhythm of the heart.
I monitored my motivation in my favorite activities, my productivity and concentration at work, my social interactions for signs of declining interest, dysfunctionality. There wasn't any salient changes.
I monitored my dreams for flashbacks. There wasn't any.
The hypervigilance and avoidance continued for the next few weeks but it slowly gotten lesser and lesser in frequency and intensity.
After the first few days, when I slowly got myself being increasingly aware of the arising of anxiety and fear, I began to systematically gain control of my body by putting it in a more relaxed state and also reinterpreting the event memory by imbuing the memory with feelings of gratitude for everyone being fine, for having a second chance to practice being a human.
Slowly after, the anxiety and fear decreases in their frequency and intensity and every time, after filling my thoughts associated with the event memory with gratitude, I started filling the following thoughts with loving-kindness, wishing for all to be well and happy.
This is the fourth week. I am feeling much better now, having been able to reach a state in which I can write about the experience. My body doesn't react as intensely as it did during the initial period after the accident.
This too shall pass.
May all be well and happy.
With Loving-Kindness
Simple Bear 14.03.2016.
Friday, March 4, 2016
Value
Value
A friend of mine, who was dealing with a quarter-life existential crisis, asked me, "what is the value of our existence?"
[Disclaimer: The below is only based on the very limited existential experiences of a bear; may not apply to humans]
My answer.
"The value of our existence lies, not in how much we are loved, but in how much we love."
Simple Bear 04.03.2016.
A lot of us determine our self worth in terms of how much we perceive to be loved by others, allowing our value to be determined by external conditions, including the responses of others to us, which we do not have control over.
We determine our value by perceiving how much our family loves us, our partners loves us, our friends love us, our companies and organizations loves us, our society looks and loves us.
We effectively handed the valuation of our self worth to others, and subjected ourselves to the pain which arises from the discrepancies between the responses of others and our expectations. The endless search for validation by others, in which we do not have control over, most of the times, results in pain and disappointments.
Not everyone have the conditions to be loved the way they want to be loved but everyone have the basic condition, the capacity to love.
There are numerous stories of nobodies who sacrificed themselves for the love of others, strangers on the street whom they have no relations to. They are hailed as heroes but before that, to most of the people who know them, they may be just zero.
I am not advocating that we all should grab hold of any opportunities to be heroes or saints; not all of us can and have the conditions to do so. However, we all should aspire to be extend our love (not the passionate, without-you-I-will-die kind of love) to as far as we can. This love is one, of empathy and compassion, of equanimity.
I understand not everyone is willing to adopt and cultivate this notion of love but I just want to emphasize that everyone have the capacity to do so.
We can start off by loving our families, our friends, the less fortunate in our societies. Not everyone can have the conditions to do things which brings happiness to everyone but we all have the capacity to bring happiness to those we love to the best of our abilities. If we have done our best to love, then regardless of the responses of others, we are worthy of the value of being here in this very present moment, as an individual, as a human, as a living being.
We are the only one who is capable of determining our value. This love requires us to first love ourselves, for the love of others and then, forget the love of ourselves.
We need to learn first, to love ourselves.
May all have the conditions to cultivate the love for others.
May all be well and happy
With loving-kindness
Simple Bear 05.03.2016.
A friend of mine, who was dealing with a quarter-life existential crisis, asked me, "what is the value of our existence?"
[Disclaimer: The below is only based on the very limited existential experiences of a bear; may not apply to humans]
My answer.
"The value of our existence lies, not in how much we are loved, but in how much we love."
Simple Bear 04.03.2016.
A lot of us determine our self worth in terms of how much we perceive to be loved by others, allowing our value to be determined by external conditions, including the responses of others to us, which we do not have control over.
We determine our value by perceiving how much our family loves us, our partners loves us, our friends love us, our companies and organizations loves us, our society looks and loves us.
We effectively handed the valuation of our self worth to others, and subjected ourselves to the pain which arises from the discrepancies between the responses of others and our expectations. The endless search for validation by others, in which we do not have control over, most of the times, results in pain and disappointments.
Not everyone have the conditions to be loved the way they want to be loved but everyone have the basic condition, the capacity to love.
There are numerous stories of nobodies who sacrificed themselves for the love of others, strangers on the street whom they have no relations to. They are hailed as heroes but before that, to most of the people who know them, they may be just zero.
I am not advocating that we all should grab hold of any opportunities to be heroes or saints; not all of us can and have the conditions to do so. However, we all should aspire to be extend our love (not the passionate, without-you-I-will-die kind of love) to as far as we can. This love is one, of empathy and compassion, of equanimity.
I understand not everyone is willing to adopt and cultivate this notion of love but I just want to emphasize that everyone have the capacity to do so.
We can start off by loving our families, our friends, the less fortunate in our societies. Not everyone can have the conditions to do things which brings happiness to everyone but we all have the capacity to bring happiness to those we love to the best of our abilities. If we have done our best to love, then regardless of the responses of others, we are worthy of the value of being here in this very present moment, as an individual, as a human, as a living being.
We are the only one who is capable of determining our value. This love requires us to first love ourselves, for the love of others and then, forget the love of ourselves.
We need to learn first, to love ourselves.
May all have the conditions to cultivate the love for others.
May all be well and happy
With loving-kindness
Simple Bear 05.03.2016.
Thursday, March 3, 2016
Fighting off the Bandit
Fighting off the Bandit
The Bandit
He comes alone in the ignorance of the night
Catches you unaware
And overpower you in a second
He robs you of your joy
And cast you to your mind
Silently he flee as swiftly as he came
Only his shadow of bitterness remains
In the ignorance of the night
Simple Bear 03.03.2016.
I went to the bakery to grab some bread for snacks this afternoon after my appointment at the hospital. As I was walking through the neighborhood, I saw a physically challenged man on a wheelchair, selling tissue papers. There wasn't a lot of people around. It was a weekday late afternoon. And those who walked past him, ignored his presence. He looked listless and fatigued.
I greeted him, took out 2 dollars and put it in his hands. I gave him a pat on the shoulders and told him to grab himself a nice cup of coffee if he needs one. He looked up at me and forced a weak smile.
I left.
When I reached the bakery, this thought came to my mind, maybe the guy is hungry and perhaps, he hadn't had much to eat. I am fortunate to be able to buy my own meal.
I decided to buy an additional two bread with chicken luncheon meat. I went back to him with the bread. I asked whether he is alright with chicken bread. He smiled and said yes, I could see his eyes sparkled at the sight of the food. He must be starving.
Before he started eating, he looked at me again and asked whether I can spare him another two dollars.
'Is he trying to take advantage of me?'
The thought ran through my mind like the flash. I caught hold of myself having the thought and laughed. This must be the habitual tendency that I have in response to such situations. This is my ego, the Mara who is tempting me.
This thought born out of ego is like the bandit. If I allow it to catch me unaware, he overpowers me and robs me of my momentary happiness of sharing. What will be left of this 'robbery' will be one of bitterness and suffering.
I could not allow it to do so.
Self-awareness is my shield against the attacks of the bandit. Thoughts born out of altruism are like my bodyguards. They fight off the bandit, forcing them to disappear in the dimension of flux.
These thought arose in me. Maybe he need the money to feed his family. Maybe today was a difficult day for him. Maybe he needs the money to pay for his medical conditions.
As soon as these thoughts arose, the thought of the possibility of him taking advantage of me was gone.
I laughed at myself again. What am I finding the reasons to manage my cognitive dissonance? If my intention is to help, there is no need for other reasons.
I gave him the two dollars that he asked for, thanked him for the opportunity and left with feelings of empathy and gratitude.
In retrospection, he is like a teacher who taught me this precious lesson. No matter what his reason was, or whether or not he was taking advantage of me. I wish him well and happy.
May all be well and happy
Simple Bear 03.03.2016.
The Bandit
He comes alone in the ignorance of the night
Catches you unaware
And overpower you in a second
He robs you of your joy
And cast you to your mind
Silently he flee as swiftly as he came
Only his shadow of bitterness remains
In the ignorance of the night
Simple Bear 03.03.2016.
I went to the bakery to grab some bread for snacks this afternoon after my appointment at the hospital. As I was walking through the neighborhood, I saw a physically challenged man on a wheelchair, selling tissue papers. There wasn't a lot of people around. It was a weekday late afternoon. And those who walked past him, ignored his presence. He looked listless and fatigued.
I greeted him, took out 2 dollars and put it in his hands. I gave him a pat on the shoulders and told him to grab himself a nice cup of coffee if he needs one. He looked up at me and forced a weak smile.
I left.
When I reached the bakery, this thought came to my mind, maybe the guy is hungry and perhaps, he hadn't had much to eat. I am fortunate to be able to buy my own meal.
I decided to buy an additional two bread with chicken luncheon meat. I went back to him with the bread. I asked whether he is alright with chicken bread. He smiled and said yes, I could see his eyes sparkled at the sight of the food. He must be starving.
Before he started eating, he looked at me again and asked whether I can spare him another two dollars.
'Is he trying to take advantage of me?'
The thought ran through my mind like the flash. I caught hold of myself having the thought and laughed. This must be the habitual tendency that I have in response to such situations. This is my ego, the Mara who is tempting me.
This thought born out of ego is like the bandit. If I allow it to catch me unaware, he overpowers me and robs me of my momentary happiness of sharing. What will be left of this 'robbery' will be one of bitterness and suffering.
I could not allow it to do so.
Self-awareness is my shield against the attacks of the bandit. Thoughts born out of altruism are like my bodyguards. They fight off the bandit, forcing them to disappear in the dimension of flux.
These thought arose in me. Maybe he need the money to feed his family. Maybe today was a difficult day for him. Maybe he needs the money to pay for his medical conditions.
As soon as these thoughts arose, the thought of the possibility of him taking advantage of me was gone.
I laughed at myself again. What am I finding the reasons to manage my cognitive dissonance? If my intention is to help, there is no need for other reasons.
I gave him the two dollars that he asked for, thanked him for the opportunity and left with feelings of empathy and gratitude.
In retrospection, he is like a teacher who taught me this precious lesson. No matter what his reason was, or whether or not he was taking advantage of me. I wish him well and happy.
May all be well and happy
Simple Bear 03.03.2016.
Living and Leaving
Living and Leaving
One and a half week after the car accident, I can still remember that night.
I could, still vividly see the image of the air bag in front of me, the smell of burning mechanical parts of the car, feeling the pain in my body and hearing the non-stop buzzing sound in my ear.
And the voice of my friend shouting at me to get out of the car.
The first thought which came to my mind, was I hope everyone is alright.
The next thought as I was in the midst of flashing lights of the police cars and ambulances, was the question, if it was time for me to leave this lifetime behind in that moment of time, was I ready?
I was (to my surprise).
Looking back at the things that I had done in the last ten years of my adult life. There was no regrets.
Looking at the person that I had grown to be, although I think I could have been a better person but again, I had no regrets being who I am now.
Death is a constant topic which I contemplated on. There are nights where I make peace with the negativity which I was suffering from during the day and at the end of the night, before I close my eyes, I had the assurance to myself that I was ready to go if the night was the last night.
And in the morning when I wake up, I remind myself with gratitude that today is a gift for me to enjoy, and for me to share.
The accident and the pain that I am feeling now are good constant reminders of the impermanence of life and of the current priorities in my life. It is a time for me to spend more time in reflection and emerge a more aware Simple Bear.
For now, I am grateful for being alive. I am grateful for my friends being safe. I am grateful that no one was seriously injured in the accident.
May all be well and happy
With Loving-Kindness
Simple Bear 03.03.2016.
One and a half week after the car accident, I can still remember that night.
I could, still vividly see the image of the air bag in front of me, the smell of burning mechanical parts of the car, feeling the pain in my body and hearing the non-stop buzzing sound in my ear.
And the voice of my friend shouting at me to get out of the car.
The first thought which came to my mind, was I hope everyone is alright.
The next thought as I was in the midst of flashing lights of the police cars and ambulances, was the question, if it was time for me to leave this lifetime behind in that moment of time, was I ready?
I was (to my surprise).
Looking back at the things that I had done in the last ten years of my adult life. There was no regrets.
Looking at the person that I had grown to be, although I think I could have been a better person but again, I had no regrets being who I am now.
Death is a constant topic which I contemplated on. There are nights where I make peace with the negativity which I was suffering from during the day and at the end of the night, before I close my eyes, I had the assurance to myself that I was ready to go if the night was the last night.
And in the morning when I wake up, I remind myself with gratitude that today is a gift for me to enjoy, and for me to share.
The accident and the pain that I am feeling now are good constant reminders of the impermanence of life and of the current priorities in my life. It is a time for me to spend more time in reflection and emerge a more aware Simple Bear.
For now, I am grateful for being alive. I am grateful for my friends being safe. I am grateful that no one was seriously injured in the accident.
May all be well and happy
With Loving-Kindness
Simple Bear 03.03.2016.
Tuesday, March 1, 2016
Unexpected
Unexpected
It was not what I expected.
I looked at her 'grumpy' face and the first thought which comes to my mind was, 'I must make it a point to smile at her and say hi to her every time I see her.'
There was a couple of times when I went to the pantry for my caffeine fix in the morning, I would see an elderly auntie cleaning the pantry, filling up the coffee and tea sachets etc. And each time when we make eye contact, I will smile and say hi to her but she would always respond with a solemn, grumpy kind of look.
Yesterday was no difference.
There was no anger at her non-responsiveness, just sadness that she is unable to smile in that very moment with me.
It reminded me of a similar experience a few days ago, I was having lunch with a colleague, and when we said thank you to an elderly auntie who cleaned our table, her response was similar.
And we had a good discussion on how being polite and kind to others is a personal choice, independent of others' responses in return. There is no expectations of reciprocity. If there should be a response on our side in return, it should be one, of compassion and empathy. In that very moment, the person is unable to experience happiness.
Do you remember, in our past experiences, how often when we are angry, or sad, or feeling just negative, we tend to ignore the kindness of others, the smiles of our friends, our family. The same goes for them, maybe they are stressed, maybe they are tired, maybe they are depressed. And sometimes, when the conditions are right, a smile generated by kindness from us makes a difference to their lives just like how sometimes, kindness from others makes a difference in ours.
So my friends, let us all make the kind choice to be kind even if the world may not respond kindly to it. Being kind makes a difference first and foremost, to ourselves, our worlds and then to others.
May the aunties and uncles be well and happy.
May all be well and happy.
With loving-kindness
Simple Bear 01.03.2016.
It was not what I expected.
I looked at her 'grumpy' face and the first thought which comes to my mind was, 'I must make it a point to smile at her and say hi to her every time I see her.'
There was a couple of times when I went to the pantry for my caffeine fix in the morning, I would see an elderly auntie cleaning the pantry, filling up the coffee and tea sachets etc. And each time when we make eye contact, I will smile and say hi to her but she would always respond with a solemn, grumpy kind of look.
Yesterday was no difference.
There was no anger at her non-responsiveness, just sadness that she is unable to smile in that very moment with me.
It reminded me of a similar experience a few days ago, I was having lunch with a colleague, and when we said thank you to an elderly auntie who cleaned our table, her response was similar.
And we had a good discussion on how being polite and kind to others is a personal choice, independent of others' responses in return. There is no expectations of reciprocity. If there should be a response on our side in return, it should be one, of compassion and empathy. In that very moment, the person is unable to experience happiness.
Do you remember, in our past experiences, how often when we are angry, or sad, or feeling just negative, we tend to ignore the kindness of others, the smiles of our friends, our family. The same goes for them, maybe they are stressed, maybe they are tired, maybe they are depressed. And sometimes, when the conditions are right, a smile generated by kindness from us makes a difference to their lives just like how sometimes, kindness from others makes a difference in ours.
So my friends, let us all make the kind choice to be kind even if the world may not respond kindly to it. Being kind makes a difference first and foremost, to ourselves, our worlds and then to others.
May the aunties and uncles be well and happy.
May all be well and happy.
With loving-kindness
Simple Bear 01.03.2016.
Monday, February 29, 2016
Regret
Regret
"Like fallen leaves in Autumn, regrets nourishes the land which give birth to life in Spring; but prior to the arrival of Spring, one may need to endure the bitterness of Winter."
Simple Bear 29.02.2016.
"Like fallen leaves in Autumn, regrets nourishes the land which give birth to life in Spring; but prior to the arrival of Spring, one may need to endure the bitterness of Winter."
Simple Bear 29.02.2016.
Thursday, February 11, 2016
Dealing With Unknown
Dealing With Unknown
"There is two ways to deal with the unknown. Fear and hope. The decision lies in your belief, and more importantly, your free will."
Simple Bear 11.02.2016.
"There is two ways to deal with the unknown. Fear and hope. The decision lies in your belief, and more importantly, your free will."
Simple Bear 11.02.2016.
Wednesday, February 3, 2016
Monday, February 1, 2016
Know thy reactions
Know thy reactions
"I can't believe no one press the bell for me!" A voice imbued with rising anger was screaming inside my head.
I felt the increasing physiological tension in my body, the increasing heart rate, the tightening of the skin etc.
This was anger.
And I am falling right into the pit of hot erupting anger 'lava'.
A minute before all these happened, I was on the bus preparing to align at the bus stop. The uncle standing in front of me was carrying a big bag on his back, blocking the way and took some time to put down his bag and let me pass towards the bus door. As I was reaching the door, the door started closing and I quickly reached for the nearest bell but the bus still drove off. The passengers near me looked at me with looks of 'why didn't the bus driver open the door but drove off instead?"
I was more frustrated by the indifference of the rest of the passengers at that moment of time.
Then I noticed the thought of 'blaming the passengers for not pressing the bell for me when I was struggling to get pass the uncle with the big bag.'
It was the 'seed' of suffering. I focused on my breath, the air flowing in and out of my body.
It was my normative reaction to the situation. If I had followed the thought, it could have grown into thoughts of blaming the uncle for not being fast enough to unload his bag, for bringing a big bag and the bus driver for not stopping despite me already at the door, struggling with the door bell; and also thoughts of going to make a complaint against the bus driver.
Frustrations will grow and the consequences would be only more sufferings for me.
The question, on the surface now is the worth of continuing with the negativity. Is it worth it? The result was only having to walk a bus stop back home but if I had followed through with all those negative thoughts, the result would be me not being able to enjoy my dinner, watching the latest episode of 'Running Man' and having a good sleep.
The answer to the question? It is not worth it.
Looking deeper within myself, such egocentric reactions are still normative for me. I have not made any much progress in terms of changing my reactions to those of empathy; the awareness is not good enough to stop the reactionary thought and respond with accepting and empathetic thoughts instead.
I reacted. I should have responded instead.
I still have a long way to go. Yesterday night episode was a good learning experience and I am grateful.
Today is a new beginning to be better than the past.
May all have the awareness to respond to situations with positivity. May all be well and happy.
With loving-kindness (I need tons of it)
Simple Bear 01.02.2016
"I can't believe no one press the bell for me!" A voice imbued with rising anger was screaming inside my head.
I felt the increasing physiological tension in my body, the increasing heart rate, the tightening of the skin etc.
This was anger.
And I am falling right into the pit of hot erupting anger 'lava'.
A minute before all these happened, I was on the bus preparing to align at the bus stop. The uncle standing in front of me was carrying a big bag on his back, blocking the way and took some time to put down his bag and let me pass towards the bus door. As I was reaching the door, the door started closing and I quickly reached for the nearest bell but the bus still drove off. The passengers near me looked at me with looks of 'why didn't the bus driver open the door but drove off instead?"
I was more frustrated by the indifference of the rest of the passengers at that moment of time.
Then I noticed the thought of 'blaming the passengers for not pressing the bell for me when I was struggling to get pass the uncle with the big bag.'
It was the 'seed' of suffering. I focused on my breath, the air flowing in and out of my body.
It was my normative reaction to the situation. If I had followed the thought, it could have grown into thoughts of blaming the uncle for not being fast enough to unload his bag, for bringing a big bag and the bus driver for not stopping despite me already at the door, struggling with the door bell; and also thoughts of going to make a complaint against the bus driver.
Frustrations will grow and the consequences would be only more sufferings for me.
The question, on the surface now is the worth of continuing with the negativity. Is it worth it? The result was only having to walk a bus stop back home but if I had followed through with all those negative thoughts, the result would be me not being able to enjoy my dinner, watching the latest episode of 'Running Man' and having a good sleep.
The answer to the question? It is not worth it.
Looking deeper within myself, such egocentric reactions are still normative for me. I have not made any much progress in terms of changing my reactions to those of empathy; the awareness is not good enough to stop the reactionary thought and respond with accepting and empathetic thoughts instead.
I reacted. I should have responded instead.
I still have a long way to go. Yesterday night episode was a good learning experience and I am grateful.
Today is a new beginning to be better than the past.
May all have the awareness to respond to situations with positivity. May all be well and happy.
With loving-kindness (I need tons of it)
Simple Bear 01.02.2016
Wednesday, January 27, 2016
Change is never easy
Change is never easy
"Is he dead?" I thought to myself as I saw a middle aged man lying motionless on the empty flooring in between shops beside the MRT station.
"Just walk away." the inner voice in me was nagging. "Don't look!"
I continued for a few steps and stopped. I remembered, it was just yesterday evening that I wish for the moral courage to do what is right and here I am, trying to walk away from a situation which I can possibly make a change.
The man was lying there, with his back to the exterior wall of a shop. I was standing there in the crowds again, for the second time in two days, looking at the man, lying silently on the ground. There were people buying their dinner and doing their late evening shopping in the shops; there were crowds of people rushing home, passing him by as if his existence was only my visual hallucination.
A little apprehension arose in me. "What if he was dead?" the fear in me asked. There wasn't any visible signs of the man breathing.
"But you can't walk away like this." my 'superego' was shouting at me.
I gathered my nerves and walked slowly towards him. I heaved a sigh of relief when I could see slight motions of him breathing as I came up close. I went to the control station, informed them of the situation and they proceed to call the police to handle the situation. As I was there beside the man, trying to ascertain the situation. Two foreigners stopped and asked if they could be of help. We went away after the station manager came to check the situation and assured us that she will call in the police.
On the way to my next destination, I reflected on my experience. The habitual tendency for us to ignore situations which doesn't involve us had been deeply rooted in us. And to change that normative tendency, two things are essential, awareness of the arising of the tendency and the will to change it. If we are not aware of the tendency arising within, it would become our automated reactions, which is to ignore the situations which may require our help to those in need. Like the experience that I went through earlier, even with the awareness of the arising of the norm, there must be an effort involved to make a deliberated choice, to go against the norm of ignoring, which is deeply rooted in us.
The first step to uniting the responsibility which is diffused, in the conditional milieu in which everyone is in, due to the bystander effect, is to take the first step to break the effect. There are people among us who have the empathy to help but they are hesitant; they prefer not to break 'the norm of ignoring' and to save ourselves from our conscience of ignoring the situation, we comfort ourselves by rationalizing that someone else will help the person in need, there is no need for us to do it. We create the bystander effect when all of us thinks the same. Together with those among us who are apathetic and we create, for ourselves a world which we complained endlessly about the lack of goodness.
'Be the change that you wish to see in the world.' Mahatma Gandhi
Two individuals among the waves of people who walked past before me and after me stopped and decided to take on the humanistic responsibility of helping another, when they saw me walking close to the man to assess the situation. Every single one of us have the power to break the bystander effect, and be the change that we wish to see in the world. Once one of us starts 'breaking the norm of ignoring', the empathetic ones among us will support each other.
We can change the world, one thought at a time, one act at a time, one person at a time. And we start from ourselves; the world is a reflection of who we are, our reactions and responses to the changes within the world within.
Hope the man is well. May everyone have the awareness and will to be the goodness that we wish to see in the world. May all be well and happy.
With loving-kindness
Simple Bear 27.01.2016.
"Is he dead?" I thought to myself as I saw a middle aged man lying motionless on the empty flooring in between shops beside the MRT station.
"Just walk away." the inner voice in me was nagging. "Don't look!"
I continued for a few steps and stopped. I remembered, it was just yesterday evening that I wish for the moral courage to do what is right and here I am, trying to walk away from a situation which I can possibly make a change.
The man was lying there, with his back to the exterior wall of a shop. I was standing there in the crowds again, for the second time in two days, looking at the man, lying silently on the ground. There were people buying their dinner and doing their late evening shopping in the shops; there were crowds of people rushing home, passing him by as if his existence was only my visual hallucination.
A little apprehension arose in me. "What if he was dead?" the fear in me asked. There wasn't any visible signs of the man breathing.
"But you can't walk away like this." my 'superego' was shouting at me.
I gathered my nerves and walked slowly towards him. I heaved a sigh of relief when I could see slight motions of him breathing as I came up close. I went to the control station, informed them of the situation and they proceed to call the police to handle the situation. As I was there beside the man, trying to ascertain the situation. Two foreigners stopped and asked if they could be of help. We went away after the station manager came to check the situation and assured us that she will call in the police.
On the way to my next destination, I reflected on my experience. The habitual tendency for us to ignore situations which doesn't involve us had been deeply rooted in us. And to change that normative tendency, two things are essential, awareness of the arising of the tendency and the will to change it. If we are not aware of the tendency arising within, it would become our automated reactions, which is to ignore the situations which may require our help to those in need. Like the experience that I went through earlier, even with the awareness of the arising of the norm, there must be an effort involved to make a deliberated choice, to go against the norm of ignoring, which is deeply rooted in us.
The first step to uniting the responsibility which is diffused, in the conditional milieu in which everyone is in, due to the bystander effect, is to take the first step to break the effect. There are people among us who have the empathy to help but they are hesitant; they prefer not to break 'the norm of ignoring' and to save ourselves from our conscience of ignoring the situation, we comfort ourselves by rationalizing that someone else will help the person in need, there is no need for us to do it. We create the bystander effect when all of us thinks the same. Together with those among us who are apathetic and we create, for ourselves a world which we complained endlessly about the lack of goodness.
'Be the change that you wish to see in the world.' Mahatma Gandhi
Two individuals among the waves of people who walked past before me and after me stopped and decided to take on the humanistic responsibility of helping another, when they saw me walking close to the man to assess the situation. Every single one of us have the power to break the bystander effect, and be the change that we wish to see in the world. Once one of us starts 'breaking the norm of ignoring', the empathetic ones among us will support each other.
We can change the world, one thought at a time, one act at a time, one person at a time. And we start from ourselves; the world is a reflection of who we are, our reactions and responses to the changes within the world within.
Hope the man is well. May everyone have the awareness and will to be the goodness that we wish to see in the world. May all be well and happy.
With loving-kindness
Simple Bear 27.01.2016.
Tuesday, January 26, 2016
Learning to be responsible
Learning to be responsible
My heart feels heavier as I walked away from her. I wondered how many times she had to experience the same anxiety and apprehension as she walked from her place to the station to go to and fro from work. I wondered how long does she had to wait in the station for someone to help her cross the stretch of carpark filled with cars.
I saw her on the MRT station platform as I was walking out of the train. She seems lost in the crowds of people rushing towards the escalators. There was some distance between us.
I waited. It was apparent that she needed help. Her white walking stick was beside her and from her unsure footsteps, she seems overwhelmed by the sounds of waves of feet rushing by her, as if time had stopped for her. No one near her turned around to assess whether she needed any help. Perhaps it was because she looked young.
I walked towards her and offered my help.
In an apologetic tone, she asked whether I could help her get to the block across the station, which was a distance away from the station. There was a busy intersection of the carpark in between the station and the block that she was going to and she was apprehensive of going through the carpark, with the cars whizzing around during this period of time. I assured her that I will help her to the block that she was going.
I lost count of the times in the 5 minutes journey that she said she was sorry for making me walk with her although it was not in the direction that I was going. And I lost count of the times that I assured her that it was ok for me and I was grateful to be of help to her.
The journey through the carpark was difficult. Perhaps it was a busy period in the evening. There were drivers trying to rush into the carpark and secure a lot and there were those, who were rushing to get onto the road. I wondered how difficult it was for her to cross this very stretch of road every single day.
Soon we reached the void deck of the block. She told me that she was good to walk the rest of the journey herself. Sensing that she prefers to be walking the rest of the journey herself. I bid her farewell and left with a heavy heart.
On the journey home, I started to think of the times, I met people who doesn't look old and frail but had disabilities which weren't apparent to others on the surface; people who were waiting for someone to notice their plights. How often they stand at the intersections of human traffic, in the malls, the parks with everyone seemingly oblivious to their presence.
I was one of those who were lost in my own world. I know the impact of bystander effect, on the diffusion of responsibility and how easy it is for us, to mind our own business and carry on our usual routines.
But I also know that it is our responsibility to unite the responsibility of, and to restore the faith, in humanity.
I wish for the positive conditions for my visually impaired friend to meet with people who can help her when she needed help. I hope each and everyone of us can become the positive condition for our own happiness and others. I hope I have the moral courage to do what is right and not just doing it right.
May all be well and happy.
With loving-kindness
Simple Bear 26.01.2016.
My heart feels heavier as I walked away from her. I wondered how many times she had to experience the same anxiety and apprehension as she walked from her place to the station to go to and fro from work. I wondered how long does she had to wait in the station for someone to help her cross the stretch of carpark filled with cars.
I saw her on the MRT station platform as I was walking out of the train. She seems lost in the crowds of people rushing towards the escalators. There was some distance between us.
I waited. It was apparent that she needed help. Her white walking stick was beside her and from her unsure footsteps, she seems overwhelmed by the sounds of waves of feet rushing by her, as if time had stopped for her. No one near her turned around to assess whether she needed any help. Perhaps it was because she looked young.
I walked towards her and offered my help.
In an apologetic tone, she asked whether I could help her get to the block across the station, which was a distance away from the station. There was a busy intersection of the carpark in between the station and the block that she was going to and she was apprehensive of going through the carpark, with the cars whizzing around during this period of time. I assured her that I will help her to the block that she was going.
I lost count of the times in the 5 minutes journey that she said she was sorry for making me walk with her although it was not in the direction that I was going. And I lost count of the times that I assured her that it was ok for me and I was grateful to be of help to her.
The journey through the carpark was difficult. Perhaps it was a busy period in the evening. There were drivers trying to rush into the carpark and secure a lot and there were those, who were rushing to get onto the road. I wondered how difficult it was for her to cross this very stretch of road every single day.
Soon we reached the void deck of the block. She told me that she was good to walk the rest of the journey herself. Sensing that she prefers to be walking the rest of the journey herself. I bid her farewell and left with a heavy heart.
On the journey home, I started to think of the times, I met people who doesn't look old and frail but had disabilities which weren't apparent to others on the surface; people who were waiting for someone to notice their plights. How often they stand at the intersections of human traffic, in the malls, the parks with everyone seemingly oblivious to their presence.
I was one of those who were lost in my own world. I know the impact of bystander effect, on the diffusion of responsibility and how easy it is for us, to mind our own business and carry on our usual routines.
But I also know that it is our responsibility to unite the responsibility of, and to restore the faith, in humanity.
I wish for the positive conditions for my visually impaired friend to meet with people who can help her when she needed help. I hope each and everyone of us can become the positive condition for our own happiness and others. I hope I have the moral courage to do what is right and not just doing it right.
May all be well and happy.
With loving-kindness
Simple Bear 26.01.2016.
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