手指

手指

"我们常常面对不顺心，伤心难过，愤怒之变时，把手指向外指; 我们忘了手是我们自己的。"
简单熊 25.03.2017.

Finger

"Often, when we meet with changes which are not in accordance with our wishes, changes which make us sad and angry, we point our finger to the external; we forgot that the hand is our hand."
Simple Bear 25.03.2017.

Sometimes all we need is a hug.

Sometimes all we need is a hug

A hug is perhaps, a non-verbal message of empathy, compassion and support for another.

I guess I am still shy about giving bear hugs to humans even when I think they need my non-verbal support in the moment. Perhaps, it is just a cultural difference.

Ms Jane Verity, Founder of Spark of Life and CEO of Dementia Care Australia was very encouraging about giving hugs to people around us when they need it.

I even got a Heart Balloon (hug token) in exchange for my hug, which I am supposed to exchange with others for another hug.

Hugs anyone?

May all be well and happy.
Simple Bear 23.03.2017.

Teddy Bear II

Teddy Bear II

I was reading my book on the train when I felt a tap on my right shoulder. I looked in that direction and that was when our eyes met.

She smiled and I smiled back.

After acknowledging her smile, I went back to my book

I guess she must have taken my smile as agreeableness. I soon felt a pair of hands trying to grab my flabby arms. I looked in her direction again.

She stopped and smiled at me, and then stick out her tongue as if to let me know the attempts to grab my flabby arm was a joke.

I smiled and returned to my book. It was quiet for a couple of seconds and then it started again, I felt her hands trying to grab my flabby arm.

I ignored her attempts, perhaps to get my attention and tried to focus on my reading. And then it happened. She started moving her hand up and down my arm.

And then I heard someone said, "Stop it dear." I turned around and saw an older woman, who was visibly embarrassed, grabbing her baby daughter's hands and she said to me, "I am really sorry."

I smiled to the little cute baby girl and her mother.

I know I may be cute, round and fluffy. But I am not a teddy bear.

P. S. I think I need to stay away from babies on the train next time

一念足以

一念足以

A thought is sufficient

P. S.

有人问， 一念何谓足以?
一念可从苦中救自己救他人; 一念也可陷自己与他人于苦中。一念足以。
我想这句话已成我的座右铭。
一念，熊。

Someone asked, what is one thought sufficient for?
A thought could save oneself and others from the sufferings of this world; a thought could plunge oneself and others in the sufferings of the world.
This quote, one thought is sufficient, had become the quote, perhaps for me to live by.
One thought, bear.

Music Have No Time (Age) Boundaries

Music Have No Time (Age) Boundaries

Spent a fruitful afternoon playing games and singing karaoke with the seniors in SilverAce@Lengkok.

The last song of the session was "童话" by 光良, a song of my era and I was amazed that an senior in her 60/70s asked for, and sang that song.

If a song is good, it transcend time (age) boundaries.

I know of younger people singing oldies but to hear a senior singing a song which is released perhaps in her 50/60s, that is a first.

Lovely surprise. In that moment, I realized I have a mentality limiting music to our perception of age.

There should not be a limit to songs percieved of different era to the perceived age group of people.

Grateful for the experience.

Grateful to the volunteers for coordinating and providing me with the platform to have this wonderful experience.

May all be well and happy.

With loving-kindness
Simple Bear 05.03.2017.

What (Who) Do You See?

I woke up this morning to receive a photo taken last night by my dear friend.

As I was looking at this photo of myself, this question arose.

Who do I see?

When this photo was taken, I (almost instinctively) told Jiahe that this photo is 'unglamorous' and should be deleted. Whereas Jiahe thinks that this photo is candid and is taken well.

This leads to the question of how do we individually see this world through the subjective lens (eyes, heart and mind) of ours.

In changes, there are normatively, for most of us, two sides (like the two sides of a coin). There are always the positive side and of course, the flip side (or the negative side).

Imagine, if we woke up on the 'left' (not the right) side of the bed, we have a tendency to perceive the changes in a more negative light rather than the positive.

When I say positive and negative, I am not referring to be purely either optimistic or pessimistic, I am talking about it in the aspect of personal growth or regression.

When we meet with changes e.g. meeting someone who we dislike, the presence of the individual acts as a retrieval cue for past negative experiences associated and engender negative thoughts in response to his or her actions or merely just his or her presence; those 'internal workings' adds to the reinforcement of the negative associations and further aggravate the memories of the individual. This process, for most of us, is almost automated in our mind.

Sunlight

Sunlight

We only see the Sun during the daytime but the Sun shines every single moment even when we are in the night.
Just like the Sun shines every moment, we should cultivate the awareness and goodness within every single moment; regardless of daytime (being in the company and seen by others) or night (being alone and unseen by others).

There may be cloudy days. There may be storms. There even be eclipses sometimes.
But the Sun still shines.
Let the light shine forth. Cause even in the night, the Moon reflects the light from the Sun.

Simple Bear 18.02.2017.

My First Crush

My First Crush

Today is the weekend before Valentines Day

A rainy day. A perfect day to think about love.

Sitting in a quiet corner in a cafe, having a cup of hot tea with Yiruma songs on my music play list. It is a good nice time to be thinking and reflecting about my love stories (real or imagined).

I came across a familiar profile on social media last night. She is someone I have not met in almost 20 years.

She is my first crush in my teens (*ok this is the time where you will see a pinkish blushing bear sitting in a cafe)

As I was laughing at the memories which arose within, a question arises, "Why did I had a crush on her?"

What qualities of hers or should I say what perceived qualities of hers did I feel in with?

Was it her long flowing hair? Was it her gentle demeanor? Was it her kindness to everyone around her? Was it her lovely smile?

Two decades had passed and my memories of her faded with time until last night, when I saw a profile picture which seems to jolt a memory stashed away in two decades worth of memories.

Was it love? Was it infatuation?

Was it just a teenage boy looking for someone to test out, in application of a concept he called love?
(At this point of time, someone would have shouted at me to stop thinking so much)

It is interesting. Isn't it?

Why do we love and how do we choose who to love?

Why? Maybe we needed to love someone and hope to be loved. Maybe we needed to be loved and had to love someone.

In terms of choice, maybe it is random, stratified or maybe just out of normative convenience due to our personal need to want to be loved.

Alas love, you give me a headache and sometimes, a heartache.

Love, such a mystery.

What can I gift

The night was quiet. The soft breeze running through my almost 'hairless' head. After an entire day of work, I looked up to the night sky and saw a bright moon shining bright.

Calmness descended upon me. I was enjoying the brief moments in the moonlight, contemplating on my life.

This question arose within, "What can I gift? Even when I am poor?"

The answer arose gently within, love.

"Love is a rare, marvellous gift. We can engender it in abundance within; and it nourishes us when we gift."
Simple Bear 10.02.2017.

Of course, love is a subject which definition had been debated since it had came into existence in people's minds. Love, in this context, refers to kindness and compassion.

Love, may just be a kind word on a frustrating day. A helping hand on a difficult day. A smile on a rainy day and sometimes, a hug on a dreadful day.

We can 'afford' it as a gift for others even when we are poor financially.

Love and its expressions are rare and marvellous. It requires the person who gifts, to go beyond one's ego, self-interests, one's pain and sufferings etc. And it nourishes one within. The presence of love within means an momentary absence of pain and sufferings even if it is temporary.

Love is a gift for others as well as a gift for ourselves.

Kindness arose. Compassion arose. Gratitude arose.

Some may ask what if others doesn't want the gift from us? Love is a lovely gift for others but it is an even more lovely gift for oneself.

It takes the arising of momentary awareness and transcendence of one's pain and sufferings to see the gift as a gift and to accept it so; embracing the love as it is.

How rare and marvellous it is to be able to experience love as it is.

It is indeed wonderful.

I looked up to the night sky. The moon is still there in the sky, shining bright.

Have a lovely night everyone.

May all be well and happy
Simple Bear 10.02.2017.

A want to love or a need to love, that is the question

A want to love or a need to love, that is the question

As I approach my mid 30s, single and unattached and since Chinese New Year is just round the corner, a lot of people had showed their concerns for me by asking me on my relationship status; and some had offered to introduce nice potential partners to me.

I am grateful for the concern. Being the eccentric bear that I am, it engenders a question in my mind, why love?

Do we love someone because we want to love someone? Or do we love someone because we need to be loved by someone?

For some of us, there is no clear answer to that question. We can't differentiate between wanting to love and needing to love; love, perhaps to some, is a mixture of both need and want. Just like sometimes, I can't differentiate whether I am a bear or a human. :D

Does us wanting to love someone, a result of us needing to be loved by someone? And that induces pain and frustrations; reciprocity in love is rarely as expected.

Going beyond just the normative definition of relationship, we look at friendship and kinship; the question remains the same. Do we love our family and friends because we need to be loved or do we just love them because we want to love?

We expects reciprocity and we suffers sometimes. Is it wrong to expect? It is not wrong but we almost certainly will suffer sometimes.

Want or need to love, that perhaps is the question with no definite answer for most of us.

And, love changes. From a want to a need; from a need to a want, sometimes, over time.

I can't even define love; but that is a question for another day.

May everyone have a lovely day ahead.

With love
Simple Bear 19.01.2017.

You are hot and you are cold

You are hot and you are cold

Friend: "I am disappointed in you."
Simple Bear: "Disappointed?"
Friend: "You seem so cold to me?"
Simple Bear: "Am I supposed to be warm?"
Friend: "I mean, since you are talking about love and kindness, aren't you supposed to be warm?"
Simple Bear: "I am not perfect, my dear. And the image of a warm and fuzzy bear is your expectations of me."
Friend: "Sorry. I didn't mean to."
Simple Bear: "There is no need to be sorry. I am grateful for you telling me. It is an inspiration."
Friend: "Inspiration for ?"
Simple Bear: "I, too falls into the subconscious trappings of having expectations and expecting the expectations to be true and disappointed when it is not. We expects others to be our expectations and in the process, fails to understand them from their perspectives."
Friend: "You mean we should not have expectations?"
Simple Bear: "We can have wholesome expectations, of ourselves and strives to be so. Some may say we won't be disappointed if we don't have expectations but the truth is, can we not have any expectations?"
Friend: "Maybe we can?"
Simple Bear: "Are we are at ease with no expectations? Are we just comfortable with just how things are in this moment of time? Most of the time, for some of us, we are not at ease. We have the expectation of not having expectations and that expectation engenders negativity."
Friend: "So, should we or should we not have expectations?"
Simple Bear: "In my limited experience, there are those expectations of others for oneself, and those of others and self for others; seek to reduce those of others for oneself. I think we can have expectations for others but we moderate it with understanding that no one is perfect. No matter how good your intention is, if we don't take into consideration the conditions of others, then it is just 'egoistic' expectations of others."
Friend: "I should work on myself."
Simple Bear: "I should work hard too. I am not perfect."

Perfection, a journey

Perfection, a journey

"I am not perfect. I have my weaknesses. If I am perfect now, I would be standing at my destination in this moment of time. It is because of imperfections that I undertook this journey of self discovery, introspection and change so that I may, at the end of the road, reach my destination of perfection, freedom from what is not freedom."
Simple Bear 14.01.2017.

Moments

Moments

"Unhappiness is a series of moments in time; so is happiness."
Simple Bear 09.01.2017.

Happiness and Unhappiness

Happiness and Unhappiness

"Sometimes our very pursuit of happiness is the cause of our unhappiness."
Simple Bear 08.01.2017.

快乐与不快乐

"有时，我们对于快乐的追求是我们不快乐的源头。"
简单熊 08.01.2017.

烦

烦

沉浸于心觉非烦
回荡红尘才知烦
不知非烦还是烦
才知非烦也是烦

简单熊 05.01.2017.

Pink Tulip

Pink Tulip

Spent my afternoon with volunteers spreading cheers of the new year with our special friends in the hospital and nursing home.

I saw the name of the ward in the nursing home, Tulip and it reminds me of my work.

What is the flower language of Tulip?

Love. Perfect love.

And pink Tulip symbolizes happiness; happiness from being loved and love.

Heard an inspirational story of care giving. A father who comes to visit the daughter every single day, bringing her out for some sunshine.

Perhaps, the significant reason to most of us finding it inspirational is due to its rarity in our society.

Most of the people in the long term stay wards in the mental health hospital and nursing homes rarely have people visiting them regularly. And some, have no one.

For them, perhaps, their closest family are the nurses who take care of them; and their friends, volunteers who comes to visit especially during festive periods.

I am inspired by the commitment of volunteers who visit them regularly. Over the years, I have seen and work with volunteers who inspired me to volunteer time and time again with their love for others.

I am super inspired by the nurses who take care of them with love and commitment. Perhaps to some, it is their job to take care of them, but the job requires tons of love. And I have seen in my daily work, the love my nursing colleagues put in their work, to provide not only the nursing care that our special friends require but also the care that their hearts needed.

Thank you nurses for working hard this holiday season to take care of those who needed the care.

Thank you volunteers for working hard this holiday season too to spread the cheers to our special friends.

Happy New Year again everyone.

May everyone love and be loved.

With Love
Simple Bear 01.01.2017.

Reflection 2016

Reflection 2016

It is the last day of the year 2016. And it is time to perhaps to do a reflection of the past 365 days.
2016 had been a crazy year for me, from surviving a car accident, months of being away from work and to a certain degree, leaving my past life behind and back to the work force, working with people in senectitude.

If there is one word to summarize my feelings and thoughts for this year, it would be gratitude.

I am grateful for:
1. Being alive
2. Opportunities to learn more about the health care sector in Singapore, especially in the mental health, dementia etc.
3. My family and friends especially during the period which I was staying at home and dealing with my internal struggle with fear and mortality.

Last but not least I like to express my gratitude to the most important person of all.

Me.

Great job Eric! You have survived and had grown over the past one year. You have grown to accept and confront your subconscious fears especially in the nights. You have grown to embrace your vulnerabilities more and emerge from the acknowledgement and confrontation, a stronger individual.
Some of my habitual tendencies had given rise to difficult times in the past but I am grateful that I am able to see them more clearly than before in 2016. It will be some time before I can reach my goal but at least I think I am slowly inching towards that destination.

2017 will be another journey of self discovery and spiritual progress. Tomorrow will be a new start to a wonderful new year.

May all have a great new year ahead.

May all be well and happy.

With Loving-Kindness
Simple Bear 31.12.2017.

人生有如两颗橘子

人生有如两颗橘子

人生际遇有如两颗橘子，一颗大而酸，一颗小而甜。
凡人拿到大的，抱怨橘子酸，拿到甜的，抱怨橘子小。
智者拿到酸的，感谢橘子大，拿到小的，感谢橘子甜。
橘子是甜，是酸，是大，是小，一切全都来自于心。

蔡志忠 《蒲公英的微笑》

English translation

Life, is akin to having two oranges

Our experiences in life is akin to having two oranges, one which is big but sour, and the other small but sweet.
When the mortal gets the big orange, he complains that the orange is sour; when he gets the sweet orange, he complains that the orange is small.
When the wise gets the sour orange, he is grateful that the orange is big; when he gets the small orange, he is grateful that the orange is sweet.
Oranges, our perception of whether it is sweet, sour, big or small originates from our mind.
Tsai Chih Chung <Smiles of Dandelion>

A rough translation, do pardon if there is any mistakes; my ang moh not good :P

Belonging

Belonging

Friend: "I am a little lost right now."
Simple Bear: "Why are you lost?"
Friend: "I feel that I don't belong anywhere. I don't feel that I belong to any of the groups in my social circle."
Simple Bear: "I feel that also sometimes."
Friend: "How do you deal with that? I am feeling sad and depressed right now."
Simple Bear: "I ask myself one question."
Friend: "What question?“
Simple Bear: "Where do you think you should belong?"
Friend: o_O ?

求人不如求己

求人不如求己

佛印禅师与苏东坡同游杭州灵隐寺时，到观世音菩萨前，佛印禅师合掌礼拜。
苏东坡问佛印说: "我们求观世音菩萨，为何祂也挂着一串念珠? 观世音菩萨在求谁?"

佛印禅师: "求观世音菩萨啊。"
苏东坡: "观世音菩萨求观世音菩萨?"
佛印禅师: "观世音菩萨比我们还清楚，求人不如求己。"